


Window to my Soul

by Littlemistake



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Star Wars Setting, Ben is NOT a peeping tom but he comes pretty close, Ben is camping at Rey's G-Spot, Car Sex, Corporate enemies to lovers, Elevator groping, Exhibitionism, F/M, Forbidden Love, House Swolo - Mistress May, Masturbation, Rey has 99 problems and the location of Ben Solo's office is one of them, Semi-Public Sex, Sneaking Around, Vaginal Sex, Window Force Bond, alternative force bond, voyer
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-13
Updated: 2019-06-27
Packaged: 2020-03-02 14:49:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 41,072
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18813127
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Littlemistake/pseuds/Littlemistake
Summary: Life is treating Rey really well. New job, new office, and a hunky stud muffin occupying the office across from hers. Pity it turns out he is her mortal corporate enemy, and she promised never to fraternize with the competition.This is a gift forLoveofEscapism, one of the amazing Headmistresses at The Writers Den, who have created a most wonderful community and is part of House Swolo's "Mistress May I" event for May 2019.I hope you enjoy this, Rebecca.





	1. Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain

**Author's Note:**

  * For [LoveofEscapism](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LoveofEscapism/gifts).



> Thank you to my wonderful betas, [MyJediLife](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MyJediLife) and [TazWren](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TazWren), and the amazing writers at the Writing Den.
> 
> Thank you to my Managing Director and Chief Financial Officer for providing the inspiration for this fic. This story was born from a discussion we had in the Managing Director’s office as we watched the construction of a vast new office building next door. The Chief Financial Officer made a joke about our MD eyeballing another MD as their offices faced each other. 
> 
> So I thought Ben and Rey might enjoy such a scenario too.
> 
> I pray neither my MD or CFO find this thank you, as I will be as busted as Ben Solo in this fic if they do.

Rey walked towards the lobby of the building she would be calling her place of employment for the next six months. The sheer glass windows captured the passing clouds in their reflection, and as she craned her neck to drink it in, the light from the sun blinded her.

****

Her building loomed over her, making her feel insignificant, tiny.

****

Not that she needed any further reason to feel small. Today was the first day at her new role at Holdo Security Services, and she was, quite frankly, terrified.

****

The office complex consisted of four office buildings, each identical in scale and stature, connected on the ground by a plaza consisting of a myriad of gardens and alcoves that flanked the main pathways into each establishment. It was beautiful, yet overbearing at the same time.

****

Two months ago, it had seemed like a good idea to take a leap and find a job that would use her talents and challenge herself, and a change from the safe, but boring work that she usually felt was all she was capable of.

****

But under the encouragement of Rose, her best friend and roommate, for once she had taken a risk and applied for - and won - her dream job, working with Amy Holdo, her corporate idol, as the new Strategy Manager. She alternated between pinching herself with joy, and cautioning herself for believing she could do the work and not fall flat on her face.

****

She crossed the lobby, heading straight for the lift to take her to the 15th floor, the brand new home of Holdo Security Services. So new that the name on the building directory was only a temporary placeholder until the permanent sign arrived.

****

She quickly straightened herself, checking that her skirt was straight, her cardigan was buttoned correctly, and that there were no ladders in her stockings or stray hairs falling out of her topknot.

****

The topknot that represented the fourth hairstyle she had attempted that morning, because everything about her just felt _wrong_.

****

She was _desperate_ to make a good impression.

****

Exiting the lift, she took a deep breath, as if trying to swallow her fears, and as she reached the correct suite, she pushed open the door. Suite 1503 was proof that the company’s occupation in the office was very recent, evidenced by the unfinished feel to the reception area. It was bare and impersonal, with no softness to offset the stark white walls.

****

The reception area seemed deserted, so she wasn’t quite sure of what she should do in the moment. Should she call out, search the office for signs of life, or just remain put?

****

Her dilemma was solved when a smiling face appeared from under the desk.

****

“Hi, I’m Finn, you must be Rey!”

****

She returned his smile, he had a nice face and exuded the kind of energy that immediately put her at ease.

****

“Hi Finn, what are you doing under there?”

****

“Trying to make sense of all the cables. Tech guys did a crap job of it.” He slid out from behind the desk, brushing himself off.

****

“Amy is running late today, she’s really sorry that she’s not here to greet you. Let me show you your office while you are waiting for her.”

****

“My office?” She had never had an office before.

****

“Sure Rey, right next to Amy’s. Let me show you.”

****

He led her down a narrow hall, past meeting rooms and offices, until they reached the end of the corridor. She could see that Amy Holdo’s office occupied the corner suite. As she peered in, she could see that it, too, was sparsely furnished, save for a smattering of photographs displayed on the expansive bookcase behind the large desk in the centre of the room.

****

Finn opened the door to her office, standing to the side to allow her to enter.

****

“Are you sure this is my office? A cubicle would do, really,” she insisted.

****

“Rey, we are really excited to have you come on board with us! Seriously, the office is yours! Get settled in and I’ll come get you when Amy arrives.”

****

“Ok...,” She was still uneasy at the idea of an _office_. What if other people needed it, or resented her for it?

****

“Rey, just a small piece of advice,” Finn stood in the doorway, about to leave. “Don’t feel bad about being important, and don’t discuss it with Amy. It won’t be received well. Just go with it.”

****

“Thanks Finn,” she smiled, at least it seemed she had one new work friend.

****

As Finn left, she surveyed the room. While certainly not as large as Amy’s, it was still quite spacious, though impersonal. She hoped she could add her own touches without ruffling any feathers.

****

The thing, however, that she was really pleased with was the full glass window - she’d never had a desk where she could look outside before.

****

She opened the blinds, eager to see the view. Disappointingly,  it turned out that the view was of the adjacent office building, And straight into an office with its blinds drawn.

****

_Hmph, not such a vista_ , she thought.

****

She placed her bag on the desk, sitting in the high backed office chair. She smoothed her hands across the length of the desk.

****

_My desk, my office, my window, my job!_ She thought.

****

She smiled to her herself, and, with a giggle, pushed the chair back from her desk to spin around, raising her hands in the air to embrace the momentum.

****

On the third spin, she was sure she noticed the blinds of the adjacent office move, causing her to immediately halt her foolishness.

****

_Act professional, Rey,_ she warned herself.

****

It would seem the blind incident was entirely serendipitous, as at that moment Finn poked his head into Rey’s office.

****

“Amy’s here, she wants to see you.”

****

Rey quickly rifled through her bag to retrieve her pen and writing pad to take notes.

****

Amy looked up as Rey entered the room.

****

“Rey! We are so glad you are here!” Rey felt elated that her corporate idol was pleased to see her - a nobody.

****

“Come in, take a seat.” She instructed. “As you know, I’ve brought you on board to help us win the new big government security contract - which is the key to this organisation’s future. We have to win it, and you are my secret weapon. You really impressed me in your interview with your ability to think strategically and work out what people want. Also, you are an unknown, so the competition will underestimate you, they won’t see you as a threat.”

****

Rey nodded, although she winced internally at the idea of both being seen, and _not_ being seen as a threat. Her anxiety was leading her to doubt everything.

****

“Now, I know you have signed a confidentiality agreement, but let me remind you, this is a highly competitive tender with several very big players as our competition. Particularly First Order Corporation, I want to nail those arrogant bastards to the wall, and you are going to help me do it.”

****

“Sure,” Rey was excited and terrified at the prospect of what lay before her. She wanted so badly to impress and please, and was terrified that she would be found wanting.

****

“So, my rules are - I expect your complete and undivided attention for the next six months, and under no circumstances will you ever - _ever_ \- engage with the enemy. I’m the only one that can handle those assholes.” Amy’s reputation as a tough cookie was legendary, and Rey knew without a shadow of a doubt that she would never, ever break one of those rules. Amy could trust her.

****

“I’m yours!” Rey said brightly, in what she hoped was her best can do attitude.

****

“Well, great, get settled in, and we’ll catch up later. Finn will help you with whatever you need.” And with that, it seemed, Rey was dismissed.

****

As Rey walked out the door, Amy called out after her: “I’m counting on you, Rey.”

****

She headed back into her office, not sure if the meeting had gone well or not. Nothing was clear.

****

As she walked behind her desk, she noticed the blinds of the office across from her were open slightly more than she had remembered.

****

_Curious_ , she thought.

****

The rest of the morning was spent doing all the mundane things that a first day always entailed. Forms, log ins, codes, forms, introductions, office tours, and, for good measure, more forms.

****

Finn was there to help her along, the two of them falling into an easy camaraderie as they sat in her office. She didn’t always get a good read on people, but she felt she could trust him.

****

“I do believe that last form means you are an officially inducted employee. You are one of us now,” Finn smiled.

****

Rey liked that idea _a lot,_ she never felt like she had belonged anywhere before.

****

“To celebrate, I’ll grab us both coffees. I’ll make sure it’s not accidentally using anyone’s favourite mug, because that’s how you get turned into a social pariah around here,” he gave her a cheeky wink. “How do you take it?”

****

“White with two, please.”

****

As Finn headed to the kitchen, Rey turned to her computer, eager to get a handle on the competition.

****

Her quick search found that First Order Corporation was as she expected, a large, faceless, take no prisoners corporate attack dog. One who would probably sell their own grandmothers if they thought they could make a buck off of it.

****

Interestingly, there was not a lot about the people who worked there, she realised.

****

_Probably because staff turnover is so high the website wouldn’t remain current for long,_ she thought drily.

****

She had been so engrossed in her research that she hadn’t noticed the coffee Finn had placed on her desk. So - it came as a rude shock when she knocked it over, spilling it all over her chest.

****

The searing hot liquid seeped through the material of her blouse, and in the moment she reacted in the only way she knew how - by quickly undoing the top buttons so she could tear it off over her head. Which left her in her office, on her first day, standing in her bra.

****

_Thank god I’m alone right now,_ she thought.

****

She quickly checked her chest for signs of burns, but it seemed that her quick thinking had saved her from injury.

****

She was relieved that she hadn’t been wearing her cardigan at the time, so she was able to use it to cover herself well enough if it was buttoned up - the blouse would need the coffee rinsed out and an opportunity to dry, as in its current state it was entirely unwearable.

****

She suddenly remembered that her window looked out across to another office. Her head whipped around to see if her little strip show had had an audience.

****

Her eyes narrowed - this time she knew she had detected a rather large amount of movement. This was confirmed when the blinds, which had been opened just a crack since the morning, became decidedly shut.

****

——

****

“And we shall crush our enemies!” Hux slammed his fist on the boardroom table for extra effect. “Especially Holdo Security! We shall grind their tiny bird bones into the ground and dance upon their corporate graves.” This was punctuated by a particularly evil laugh.

****

Ben Solo inwardly rolled his eyes, Hux was such a dramatic shit. At least that meant that _he_ didn’t have to rally the troops - Hux was particularly attached to his morning propaganda huddle with the team in the boardroom.

****

It suited Ben just fine. It wasn’t that he _couldn’t_ work with others, he did, often. But Ben’s drive came from achieving his individual goals, rather than team ones. So if he needed to work with a team in order to achieve those individual goals, so be it. But, outside of that, he had no interest in motivating others. They could be responsible for their own drive, just as he was.

****

“Now back to your desks! No prisoners, no mercy!” Hux was especially good at building corporate culture.

****

Relieved the morning meeting was done for another day, Ben returned to his cold, austere office, which was exactly how he liked it. When instructing the office interior decorator as to the “vibe” he wanted, the phrases used were:

****

  1. Dont fuck with me
  2. Don’t bore me with your shit
  3. Don’t come to me with your problems
  4. Don’t loiter in here, no chit chat
  5. If I see a picture of a cat, with the phrase “hang in there” I’m going to dispose of it in a most unpleasant way.



****

And, true to form, the interior decorator had nailed the brief, with everything black, chrome and metallic. Function over aesthetics, performance over comfort.

****

The only break from his rule was the Visconti Alchemy Fountain Pen placed carefully next to his desk top, which was his grandfathers. To the uninitiated, it just looked like an expensive pen for a man who liked expensive things. But it’s significance was known to him, and him only.

****

The Alchemy Pen was inspired by the ideas of dualism, of balance. Each end of the fountain pen contained a nib, allowing Ben to write from both ends and in two different ink colors. Not that he ever felt the need to.

****

Each half of the red resin barrel was over-layed in silver and gold plating engraved with symbolic elements of the Alchemy philosophy.

****

When not in use, it was suspended magnetically inside a display with two dragons forming a circle of life, which in turn was held vertically by a large, cone-shaped crystal inkwell.

****

It was a thing of beauty, and one of the few things that held sentimental value to him.

****

As was customary for him after the morning kick off, he went to his window to open the blinds just a crack. Not that there was usually anything interesting to see, other than the office in the building across the complex. But, he liked the way the shards of light refracted against the crystal inkwell of the pen.

****

_Poor design choice,_ he mused. He wasn’t interested in peering into the lives of others, he preferred to stay wrapped up in his own.

****

Only this time when he tilted the blinds, he saw that the office he has been  looking into now had the blinds completely open.

****

With a new occupant.

****

Ben Solo did not believe in love at first sight. Love was for the weak and the foolish. He appreciated women, though he generally preferred women like Phasma, the Human Resources Manager. An entirely outcome oriented, transactional, key performance indicator, fulfill the brief approach. But no added bonus unless you counted the number of times Ben was able to make a woman unravel with his tongue (which he could - and which he did).

****

For his approach to women was identical to the brief given to the interior decorator of his office.

****

Namely -

  1. Dont fuck with me (to clarify, Ben very much liked to fuck with, rather than to _be_ fucked with)
  2. Don’t bore me with your shit
  3. Don’t come to me with your problems
  4. Don’t loiter in here, no chit chat
  5. If I see a picture of a cat, with the phrase “hang in there” I’m going to dispose of it in a most unpleasant way (replace with, if you try to leave a toothbrush at my apartment consider our contract null and void and I wish you all the best, just not the best with me)



****

So, he was confused by his reaction to the occupant, who while (breathtakingly, he noted) gorgeous, seemed soft and innocent. His evaluation was confirmed as she smoothed her hands across her desk, only to then push herself away on her chair and spin around, her hands in the air like it was some kind of amusement park ride.

****

_First time with your own office, I’ll bet_ , he thought, pushing the blinds open a little more to get a better look.

****

Ben Solo didn’t get excited at the prospect of having his own office. He was fucking entitled to one at the bare _minimum_.

****

Still, it was quite enchanting to watch her, until she sensed she had an audience, quickly whipping her head to look in his direction. Sprung, he stumbled back from the window, feeling like a peeping Tom found hiding in the bushes under a pretty girl’s window.

****

He was no peeping Tom.

****

To reassure himself of this, he returned to his desk. He was a very important man, with very important things to do. Like finding out who this mysterious Green Light Security company was. Word on the street was that they were making a big play for a government security contract that both First Order Corporation and Holdo Security prized so highly. He always kept abreast of the competition, but in this case it was proving rather difficult, as his search results yielded little. But his sources were always reliable, so he knew not to give up so quickly.

****

He shot off an email to the First Order Legal Counsel, requesting a full background check for good measure.

****

Curious to see what was going on to the other building, he spun in his chair, dragging it over to the window. As he tugged the blinds just a crack, he could see the young woman was seated next to a man at her desk. They seemed quite comfortable with each other, although he didn’t think their relationship was of an intimate nature.

****

_Pretty sure I’d make her forget about forms if that was me sitting me next to her,_ he thought.

****

Ben was surprised at his licentious thoughts, the… girl was absolutely not his type,and likely, in his estimation, to turn into one of those stage 5 clingers that attempted to break his toothbrush rule.

****

The man said something to her (he was smiling - some kind of congratulations perhaps?) and then disappeared out the door, only to return a few minutes later with a coffee which he placed on the desk next to her.

****

He used the pen to push the blinds open a little further, she seemed awfully intent of what she was looking at on her computer, and she hadn’t even acknowledged the coffee placed before her. He recognised that intensity and focus. It was one of his own defining qualities, after all.

****

He drew in a sharp breath as her hand brushed the unnoticed coffee into the air, depositing the steaming contents across her blouse. He was suddenly flooded with emotion that he couldn’t quite put his finger on - was that… concern?

****

His concern turned to something else entirely, however, when her solution to avoiding third degree burns was to rip the soiled blouse up over her head, leaving her standing in her bra. A black, lacy bra that was quite unexpected - considering the youthfulness of her appearance. As her fingers gently explored her décolletage (for scalds he imagined, but his mind went elsewhere), his mouth ran dry, and was that a twitch in his pants?

****

While pondering his thoughts, he failed to notice that she had put on the cardigan that was hung on the back of her chair and that the pen that had originally opened the blinds only a couple of inches had now dragged them down to leave a gaping maw. It was hardly the actions of a successful businessman, one who always remained cool under the most extreme of circumstances.

****

By this time, it appeared she was inspecting the state of the blouse, as if determining what to do next. He saw her stiffen, once again whipping her head around to look in his direction. Ben felt so, well, _seen_ , that he fell back in surprise - knocking himself off the chair as he went. Desperate to shield himself from her knowing gaze, he quickly pulled the blinds shut, and stretched out on the floor, the rush of adrenaline ( _yes, the adrenaline_ he told himself) leaving him breathless.

****

He spent the rest of the day with the blinds closed and his back to the window to avoid temptation. For Ben Solo was a successful businessman who always remained cool, under the most extreme of circumstances.

****

And he was _not_ a peeping Tom.

  


 

 

 

 


	2. I once was blind, but now I see

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey and Ben discover each other's true corporate identities, much to their dismay. Can they both turn a blind eye to the truth about each other? Or is love blind?
> 
> This is a gift for [LoveofEscapism](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LoveofEscapism), one of the amazing Headmistresses at The Writers Den, who have created a most wonderful community and is part of House Swolo's "Mistress May I" event for May 2019.
> 
> I hope you enjoy Chapter 2, Rebecca. Chapter 1 was a blast.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I will be crowbarring in as many gosh darn blind jokes as I please.
> 
> Thank you to my wonderful betas, [MyJediLife](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MyJediLife) and [TazWren](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TazWren), and the amazing writers at the Writing Den.
> 
> Chapter 3 is with my lovely betas, and oh my - Window Force Bond Shenanigans will be featured!

While the buildings within the complex themselves were identical, it turned out that the quality of the coffee at each of the ground floor cafes was not.

****

Bazine had given Rey the lowdown that the best coffee was to be found in the building next to theirs. A small detour - but well worth the effort - and apparently the baristas were cute.

****

Her journey across the complex was made a little more precarious due to the very large indoor plant she was carrying out in front of her. The large green fronds pushing across her face made it difficult for her to see where she was going.

****

Unfamiliar with the territory as she was, she narrowly missed toppling into one of the ornamental ponds that were dotted around the pathways connecting the office buildings to each other. The only thing preventing her from mishap was the hand that reached out to grab her elbow to guide her away from where she was headed.

****

She jumped, the touch was unexpected and because of the fronds of her plant she couldn’t see who was rescuing her.

****

A deep, velvety voice informed her, “Need to watch out for the water features. It gets pretty interesting around these parts, sometimes, after friday night drinks.”

****

Rey was still unable to see the owner of the voice, until he parted the fronds and she saw his face. His very sexy, and very beautiful face. And his very sexy, and very expensive suit. And his very sexy, and devilishly rumpled hair.

****

Rey didn’t believe in love at first sight, it was for romance novels and fairy tales. But the man standing in front of her took her breath away, especially as she was very aware that his hand was still on her elbow.

****

“Can I help you with your plant?” he asked.

****

“Um, sure,” she replied, “I’m just going to get coffee at the building next to mine, and then head up to my office.”

****

“Let me get you safely across the plaza,” he said, taking the pot from her hands. It  had dwarfed her when she carried it. He, on the other hand, dwarfed the pot. 

****

“I’m Rey.” She said as she stuck out her hand, realizing belatedly that his were occupied with carrying the plant.

****

“I’m Ben.” they both laughed as he awkwardly shifted the pot so he could shake her hand. His hands were warm, soft and well manicured. Her stomach buzzed as they touched.

****

“Shall we?” she said, leading the way.  As they walked, she continued to steal glances in his direction, and if she wasn't mistaken, he was doing the same to her.

****

As they entered the lobby to his building, they both headed straight for the cafe.

****

“What can I get you?” he asked.

****

“Oh no,” she smiled, “I insist, it's only fair after helping me with my plant.”

****

He paused, and then stated, “No really, allow me. What will you have?”

****

“White with two,” she said - it was difficult to refuse him, it seemed.

****

He went to the counter and placed their order.

****

They both stood in silence. Ben was the first to break the silence.

****

“So, this is my building.”

****

“Oh, that’s… nice,” she responded, not quite sure what to say. “I just moved in next door. Today is day two.”

****

Their coffee order was called, and after collecting it they both headed back into her building.

****

While Ben seemed like a perfectly reasonable man, this didn’t prevent her instincts from kicking in, and she wasn’t about to tell a complete stranger where she worked, no matter how bloody sexy he was.

****

“I’ll be good from here. Thank you, Ben, for helping me with my plant, that’s really kind.” she took the pot from his arms, balancing her coffee on top of it.

****

His face narrowed in concern, adjusting the coffee cup to be a little more secure.

****

Taking a deep breath, he stammered.

****

“Ah, it’s not just the plant, I also wanted to apologise to you.”

****

“Apologise to me?” She said, furrowing her brow.

****

“Rey, I’m in the office opposite yours. I… accidently saw what happened with the coffee yesterday. I wasn’t spying on you, honest. I was just surprised to see someone in that office after it had been vacant for so long. I’m sorry, and I wanted to apologise in person. And so you would know to avoid me in the future, if that’s what made you feel comfortable.” 

****

The words seemed to tumble out of him at a rapid pace, as if he wanted the opportunity to explain before she could cut him off and accuse him of being a deviant or some such thing.

****

“It felt pretty creepy, Ben, I didn’t know who was watching me,” she said.

****

_ But if I had known it was you, well, that might have been a completely different scenario,  _ she thought. She was annoyed, but then again he did find her to apologise when he could have easily just hidden away. She would never have known.

****

“Well… thank you for coming clean,” she said. “Maybe I’ll catch you around sometime.”

****

\---------

****

Rey entered her office, seeking the best possible position for the new addition to her office. 

****

_ Plants need a source of light _ ,  _ I should put it by the window _ . 

****

_ I should really check how much light actually comes in here, I should open the blinds. _

****

To her surprise, upon drawing the blinds, she was greeted by Ben’s grinning face, who had apparently also decided that maximising the natural light in his office was also the most important thing he could do that day.

****

He gave an awkward wave. 

****

She waved back. She gestured towards her plant on the floor.

****

_ “You like?”  _ She mouthed, gesturing towards the pot.

****

He gave an exaggerated look of consideration.

****

“ _ No, _ ” he shook his head. 

****

“ _ No? _ ” she mouthed back, hands on hips.

****

He made a gesture she couldn’t decipher. She shook her head and shrugged her shoulders to indicate that she didn’t understand.

****

He raised his hand to indicate she should wait, as he went to his desk.

****

Returning with paper, and what looked to be a very flashy (from the way the silver and gold reflected in the light of the window… was that a  _ fountain _ pen?) pen. Resting the paper upon the window, he began writing with long strokes, holding the finished sheets in his hand as he completed the next.

****

While awfully curious as to what he was writing, she also realised that while his attention was diverted, it presented the perfect opportunity for an external environmental scan of Ben… whatever his last name was.

****

Starting from the top she noted gorgeous, glossy raven locks that he was fond of raking his impressive hands through. She remembered his face from that morning, his strong brow, soulful whiskey eyes, utterly kissable ( _ or fuckable? _ \- the thought made her blush) lips and an  aquiline nose. His was an unusual beauty, she mused. The deciding factor in his attractiveness, she determined, was his  _ energy _ \- he radiated power - and something else, something more animalistic. 

****

Yet here he was, being a goofball in her window. 

****

Her eyes trailed down his body. It was unlike any body she had ever seen, and it left her mouth dry, her knees weak and her stomach doing flip flops like she was on a roller coaster. He had both broad shoulders and chest, with powerful arms that tested the tension of his tailored shirt.The man was  _ built _ , with powerful thigh muscles that bulged underneath his pants completed the package.

****

The external environment was very, very good.

****

The internal one, it seemed, held promise, too.

****

Having finished the job, Ben then flipped the paper around, so she could see it.

****

It looked like… his phone number… written in very large, very thick lettering. Which explained why he was taking so long to write it out. Fountain pens, by their very nature, were a poor substitute for a Sharpie.

****

“ _ Really? _ ” she mouthed.

****

He nodded in reply.

****

She walked to her bag, and pulled out her phone before composing a message to him

****

_ You don’t like what I have done with the place? _

****

_ It's pointless having it on the floor. You need to have it at eye level. _

****

_ So, where do you suggest then? _

****

_ On the sideboard. That way you can see it while you work. Give you something to look at. _

****

Rey giggled. She could think of better things to look at.

****

_ Yes, something to look at would be nice for a change. _

****

She moved the plant to the sideboard, and saw that he was right. It did give a nicer line of sight as Rey looked at the time.

****

But it wasn't the best view of the house. Not by a long shot.

****

_ Thank you for your interior decoration advice. Best be getting back to work now. _

****

_ You are welcome, Rey, but the pleasure was all mine. Chat later? _

****

_ Sure, I’d like that. _

****

\-------

****

_ Ben Solo, General Manager of Strategy and Communications at the First Order Corporation was quoted as saying... _

****

Ben Solo, of the First Order Corporation...

****

Rey stared at her computer screen, terror gripping her at an exponential rate as each moment passed.

****

That afternoon, when she finally hit paydirt with her research into the First Order Corporation, she did not expect to see the stern face of Ben Solo staring back at her. 

****

Ben... from the First Order.

****

_ If Holdo ever found out, I’m dead _ , Rey realised.

****

So, by accepting assistance from a handsome stranger, flirting with him, letting him help carry her  _ freaking pot plant _ for chrissake, it turns out she was inadvertently engaging in one of the biggest career killing moves of her life - and breaking a company rule that she would never knowingly break.

****

In a state of panic she ran to the window, pulling the cord so that once drawn the blinds fell to the floor with a crash.

****

Ben Solo was  _ not _ a helpful, slightly goofy, funny, devilishly handsome (well yes, he still was) man that was ready to dispense on-point interior decoration tips.

****

No, Ben Solo was a lowdown, good for nothing bastard who worked for the one of the most heinous companies on the planet (according to Holdo), the First Order Corporation.

****

Her heart pounding, she heard an incoming text message on her phone. She knew it was him, but she had no idea what to do at that moment.

****

_ Rey, what’s the matter, are you alright? _

****

_ Rey, what happened? _

****

_ Rey, I’m worried about you. _

****

_ I’m coming over to find out what’s going on. And you can’t stop me. _

****

With that last text, Rey knew exactly what she had to do. 

****

Stop Ben Solo from coming up to the 15th Floor.

****

\--------

Ben stood in the lobby, chest heaving and a slow panic spreading throughout his body.

****

His day had started well, it seemed. He had found the girl, saved her from certain doom in an ornamental pool, found out her name ( _ Rey _ , like sunshine, he thought), shook her hand (tiny and delicate in comparison to his), bought her a coffee, apologised for being an accidental creep, spent the majority of the morning flirting with her through glass and air, and then gave her his number. By using copious amounts of  _ very _ expensive ink drawing his number for her with his grandfather’s priceless fountain pen.

****

Then, just as quickly, his luck had evaporated like party guests at clean up time. The girl (Rey, like sunshine), had suddenly pulled the blinds and blocked him out - for no apparent reason.

****

So, he did what all super successful businessmen - who remain cool no matter what the circumstances - do, he bolted out the door, down the stairs, across the plaza and into the lobby of her building to try and find out which office she worked in.

****

The reason for her sudden change in temperament was clear - Suite 1503 - Holdo Security Services.

****

The sworn enemy of First Order Corporation, whose tiny bird bones Hux would like to crush, and then dance upon their corporate graves.

****

She worked for the enemy. She  _ was _ the enemy.

****

And the (breathtakingly gorgeous) enemy was running straight towards him in the lobby of her building, while God knew how many other Holdo staffers were around. 

****

Desperate to avoid detection, he grabbed her arm and led her to the nearest stairwell, thankful for the identical layouts of their buildings so he was able to make a quick exit. Once out of sight from enemy eyes, he spun around to look at her. Her face was just as fierce.

****

“You're with Holdo,” he spat. “Scavengers of the Security industry.”

****

“You're with the First Order - what are you going to do after everyone sells out their grandmothers?” she spat back.

****

“Are you some kind of spy?” he asked incredulously. “Some kind of femme fatale out to seduce me for my corporate intelligence?”

****

Confusion spread across her face, “What do you mean, femme fatale? Do not let your ego write cheques for you that you can’t cash, Ben.  I didn’t even know you existed until this morning when you groped me under the pretence of “saving” me from a pond. And you can keep your precious  _ corporate intelligence _ . The bile you peddle isn't worth the brain cells it would take to process it.”

****

They glared at each other.

****

“ _ Stay away from me, _ Ben Solo. This job means too much to me to risk it on some....  _ pervert  _ who likes to spy on women from behind the safety of his blinds.” 

****

He winced at the accusation - he had hoped his apology had been as accepted by her, as it had been sincere. Apparently not.

****

Smarting from her words, all he could muster in reply was: “You don't need to concern yourself with me, Rey. You are  _ nothing  _ to me, like all the other Holdo minions.”

****

With a slam of the stairwell door, he was gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you enjoyed this fic, please leave kudos - or better yet - a comment. I love receiving and responding to comments, they make my day!
> 
> I'm having a tonne-o-fun with the comments for this one.


	3. I spy with my little eye

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the aftermath of their discovery, Ben continues to needle Rey about her true motivations. So, she takes matters into her own.. hands... to teach him a lesson. 
> 
> Window Force Bond smut has begun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to my wonderful beta crew - [MyJediLife](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MyJediLife) and [TazWren](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TazWren).
> 
> [LoveofEscapism](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LoveofEscapism) I hope you enjoy this!

_ “You are nothing to me.” _

****

During the weeks since her altercation with Ben Solo, his words had rung out multiple times a day in her mind.

****

She knew she had hurt him with her words, too, accusing him of being a filthy pervert, and, at the time, in the back of her mind she wondered if perhaps she had gone too far, but the anger, fear and adrenaline had kept her firmly in combat mode.

****

The most perplexing thing about it all was why she even cared. The sum total of their “relationship” could be summarised as one coffee (or two if one counted the coffee she spilled on her blouse), one face to face encounter, one flirty exchange via glass and their phones, and one duke it out, no holds barred, take no prisoners argument in the stairwell of her office building.

****

There had been another encounter outside his office building last week. She had done her best to avoid detection by waiting outside the foyer while Bazine filled her coffee order at what was apparently the only coffee joint worth frequenting. In the whole business complex - with at least 1,000 different businesses - apparently only  _ one _ had good coffee. 

****

Which, of course, would have had to have been the exact time Ben walked past her into his building. She really did not want to make eye contact with him, but she could feel his eyes bore into hers as he walked, his enormous frame captured in the corner of her eye.

****

She felt the heat rise up through her arms and chest, her heart going a million miles an hour. Unable to resist the temptation, at the very last moment she raised her eyes to lock onto his. 

****

Her breath hitched at the intensity of his gaze. Like it was piercing into her very soul.

****

_ How the hell did it get to this?  _

****

And just like that, the moment passed and he was gone.

****

But, it appeared, not happy to leave well enough alone - as he fired off a text message.

****

_ Spying on me? _

****

_ I’m just making sure the First Order isn’t selling their grandmothers for a quick buck again,  _ she shot back.

****

She knew all of this shouldn’t matter so much, but it did.

****

Bazine bounded up to Rey, coffee in hand.

****

“Rey, did you see him?”

****

Rey stiffened, fear pricking into her chest.

****

“See who?” she asked carefully.

****

“Ben Solo, from First Order. I mean, what’s he doing here?” Bazine exclaimed.

****

“Yeah, that’s weird.” Rey didn’t want to let on that she knew their headquarters were in this very building, Level 15 to be exact. Plausible deniability was the way to go.

****

“But didn’t you see him? I mean, you can’t miss him. I know he’s the enemy and all, and I’d never say anything to Holdo, but I’d totally cross enemy lines for an hour or two with  _ that _ !” Bazine’s eyes were wide with excitement.

****

Ben Solo had that effect on women, Rey was keenly aware of this fact. But there was no way to handle this shared knowledge without compromising her job. 

****

“Oh, I’ve never met him, so I wouldn’t know,” she replied, trying to appear nonchalant about it.

****

Bazine seemed eager to share the gossip with Finn, so Rey was greatly relieved when she started to make a beeline for the lobby of their building.

****

———

****

Rey sighed as she looked at her computer screen. The earlier interaction with Ben had left her feeling discombobulated, making it impossible to concentrate on her work.

****

The fact that he could be within her line of sight, if only both of them drew the blinds of their windows, did not help, not one bit. It was like his presence was still there, the potential for interaction, to connect with each other.

****

Rey had considered many times asking Amy for a relocation, but Finn’s warning to not bring up such matters lingered with her. In any case, what could she say? That she was requesting a move due to the view of the most devastatingly attractive man she had ever met, who bought her coffee and carried her pot plant, and, by the way, is one of the head honchos of the sworn enemy of Holdo Security?

****

She didn’t think so.

****

_ My desk, my office, my job,  _ she thought. _ Forget about the window. _

****

So, in the weeks following her encounter with Ben Solo, the blinds had remained closed. Not that she didn’t peer through the slats of the blinds occasionally, just to check if anything had changed.

****

Rey checked her watch, it was time for her meeting with Amy.

****

Over the month or so she had been working at Holdo Security Services, she had come to both dread and long for these meetings.

****

On the days where Amy’s assessment was that Rey had kicked goals and taken names, Rey was aglow from the praise. She felt safe, secure and confident in her role as Strategy Manager. Almost as if she knew what she was doing. She felt the risk was had  been worth it.

****

On the days however, where Amy found Rey’s efforts wanting, those were darker. Days where her work was discarded like yesterday’s news. Where she was told to go back and do it again, do better, be smarter, work harder. Where she just wanted to crawl under her desk and never come out again.

****

Finn and Bazine were her work buddies, and while she could join in their banter over lunch and coffee breaks, she couldn’t talk about what was really on her mind.

****

Her thoughts were broken by the trill of her phone, and looking down at it, she noticed it was Amy, who she thought was in the office.

****

“Hi Amy,” she injected her best can do attitude into the inflection of her voice.

****

“Rey! Thank God you’re there,” Holdo sounded desperate. “I’m stuck in traffic, and there’s no way I can make my 4pm. You’re going to have to cover for me.”

****

Blind panic shot through Rey like wildfire. The 4pm was a very,  _ very _ important meeting that Rey had been helping Amy prepare for for weeks. To be eligible for the contract they were working so hard to win, someone from each company had to attend a special briefing session held by the Department running the tender.

****

There was only one thing that terrified her more than a very, very important meeting. And that was a very, very important meeting that Ben Solo was highly likely to attend.

****

“Are you... sure?” Rey faltered. 

****

“Fuck no! Not at all, but if we don’t have a rep at the meeting then we can kiss this opportunity goodbye. So Rey - I need you to go, get Finn to get you on the list, find out who's there, where they are from, and take note of the questions. And whatever you do, don’t speak to  _ anyone  _ from the FIrst Order. Rey, don’t fuck this up.” With that, Holdo hung up.

——

****

Possibly her biggest regret was that if she had known that she would be seeing Ben Solo that day, she would have paid special attention to her appearance. Although, truth be told, Rey paid extra special attention to her appearance  _ everyday _ , just in case she bumped into him.

****

She checked on her phone to make sure she had the correct address, passing through security to head up to the level where the briefing session was being held.

****

As she waited anxiously for the lift to arrive, she noted a familiar hulking form to her right. Turning slightly to take him in, she also noticed he was with a tall, red haired man with an entirely sour disposition. 

****

Her heart pounded in her ears at the sight of him, and she found it difficult to breath. More than that, she was especially aware that she was about to share a confined space with him.

****

_ Stay cool _ , she warned herself.

****

The lift arrived, and they all shuffled in. Somehow she had managed to position herself directly behind him, with his back pressed against the length of her body. Due to his height, her line of sight was directly in between his shoulder blades, and she was sure she could detect the scent of his shampoo as his hair brushed her face. For one heady moment she closed her eyes, only to realise upon reopening them that the red haired man was looking at her like she was utterly out of her mind.

****

She averted her gaze, embarrassed at her own display. Her embarrassment was quickly replaced with red hot desire; however, when Ben’s backside was pushed into her pelvis, causing her to let out a small squeak.

****

_ Please don’t have heard it, please don’t have heard it, _ she prayed.

****

He ducked his head to the left, as if to work out what was going on behind him.

****

_ He heard it, _ she realised, her stomach sinking into the floor.

****

Thankfully, they reached their floor, and they joined the throng of business people exiting the lift. Apparently, this briefing was popular. 

****

As she signed her attendance against her name at the door, she took the opportunity to scan the rest of the list for the companies in attendance. First Order was there, of course, and Holdo Security. There were a few other names she was familiar with (Fett Corporation, Hutt Industries) and a few she wasn’t (Binks Inc., Green Light Security).

****

She entered the meeting room, quickly assessing where she would be best placed to sit. And by best placed, that meant as far away from Ben Solo as possible.

****

All she could see was a sea of black and grey suits, and it dawned on her that:

****

  1. Her net worth was easily the lowest in the room, along with her age.
  2. She was one of very few women in the room.
  3. Even in a room full of powerful men, Ben still towered over everyone.



****

She took a seat at the back of the room, notepad in hand and ready to take copious notes. As the session progressed, she recorded who asked what, to whom and what the answers were.  It was all excellent intel, and her brain started to whirl with what the information meant for the project and what she needed to do.

****

When she heard that infuriatingly sexy deep timbre of Ben Solo, magnified by the roving microphone, she immediately froze. He was to the far left of her, and as she looked up she noticed he stood facing the panel of government officials. 

****

“My question concerns attempted corporate espionage -what process should be followed where a company suspects another, smaller company of attempting to steal trade secrets?”

****

The government official answering the question looked perplexed. “This is a very serious matter, Mr. Solo. Do you have proof?”

****

The red haired man Ben had come in with looked aghast at Ben’s question.

****

“Just a suspicion at present, we are conducting our own investigations. But that doesn’t answer my question,” Ben replied, shifting his head so instead of responding to the front of the room, he was looking directly at Rey.

****

Blind fury poked at her like a fire brand. How dare he - maybe she was the only one in the room that knew his comments were directed at her, but she felt the sting nonetheless.

****

She reached for her phone, madly scrolling for an appropriate emoji befitting his antagonistic question.

****

She quickly found it, shooting it off to him with rapid fire. 

****

“Well, Mr. Solo, come speak to me after this session, and we will discuss the matter privately,” the official responded.

****

As Ben sat, he withdrew his phone, smirking as he looked.

****

It just made her even angrier, and she was the first to leave once the briefing session concluded.

****

——-

****

Rey was still in a state of white fury as she stalked through the deserted plaza. The hour was late, so most offices were closed for the day. She pulled her wrap around her tighter as the cold night air chilled her.

****

It had taken her forever to find a taxi back to the office, as it appeared that, in addition to having the lowest net worth in the room, she was also the only attendee without a car service or a driver.

****

Rey was headed back to her office, with the intention of putting in a few hours more work. The unexpected meeting had thrown off her schedule, and in any case, she was so angry at Ben there was no way she would be able to get to sleep.

****

_ I’m just angry. Nothing else _ , she told herself.

****

Her footsteps echoed as she strode across the lobby to the lift. She punched the lift button hard, which is actually what she really wanted to do to his face.

****

While her every movement was aggressive, and intended to release her tension, it had little effect.

****

Back in her office, she flicked on the light and slammed her bag on her desk in frustration, flinging her wrap on her chair. As she kicked off her shoes, she heard the familiar ding of an incoming message.

****

_ Working late? _

****

She decided to ignore him, she was not going to give him the satisfaction.

****

Three minutes passed, and another message came in:

****

_ I know you’re there. I can see the light in your office.  _

****

_ Pussy. _

****

That was all it took to get a response from her: 

****

_ Fuck you, Ben Solo. You enormous prick. _

****

Without skipping a beat he shot back:

****

_ Auto correct fail, baby, I think you meant -  Ben Solo, fuck me with your enormous prick.  _

****

Her mouth dropped in shock (and with more just a little excitement) at the forwardness of his reply.

****

_ And I would - if you didn’t work for the fucking enemy. _

****

The content of his last message had her heart pounding in both anger and anticipation. So, he wanted to fuck her - she would instead fuck with  _ him _ .

****

_ I’m not your fucking baby. So First Order - thinking you can take anything you want.  _

****

_ I don’t want anything, Rey, just you. _

****

That last exchange made her heart stop.

****

_ You can’t have me Ben. Not ever. _

****

_ Oh, but I think I can, lots of ways. _

****

_ I’d like to see you try. _

****

_ I’d very much like to. _

****

_ And do what? _

****

_ I know multiple ways to please you, multiple times. _

****

She knew she was playing a dangerous game, but the opportunity to show Ben what she was really made of, and that she was just  _ fine _ without his attention, was too good to resist. A smirk spread across her face, as well as a fire throughout her entire core. She knew exactly what she needed to do.

****

She typed the message out, but just before she sent it she went to the window, and  - for the first time in four weeks - opened the blinds.

****

He was waiting for her, his own window completely uncovered. The light of his computer screen backlit his frame as he lent against his desk, arms folded, phone in hand. His jacket and tie had been discarded, and his sleeves were rolled up, exposing his thick forearms. 

****

The sight of him sent a charge rocketing throughout her, heightened by her fury at how he had behaved earlier that afternoon. She felt herself clamp down deep inside as a wave of dampness flooded her panties. 

****

She pressed send.

****

_ I don’t need you to achieve pleasure, Ben. I do just fine on my own, and with no bitter aftertaste. _

****

He casually lifted his phone to read her message. She couldn't be sure from the distance, but she was relatively confident she saw a raised eyebrow and a wry smile.

****

He typed a message in return, and then returned his gaze to her.

****

Her eyes widened as she read his response.

****

_ Why don't we run a little experiment? You do your thing, and then I’ll do my thing. _

****

Another message followed soon after.

****

_ To you. _

****

Rey was overcome with the desire and need that she had been pressing down for the last four weeks. Her last reserve broken, the only thing she could think about was him, and the throbbing ache between her thighs, and how much she needed that release.

****

_ And then I’ll get back to my work, as soon as this is over, _ she told herself.

****

Her base instincts urged her to thrust her hand into her panties, to rub and stroke her swollen nub until she collapsed into a mess in front of the window. But that wouldn’t do, she wanted Ben Solo to see that she was in control, that she didn’t need him for pleasure - and for him to  _ know _ what it was that he was missing.

****

Her hands went to her blouse, slowly releasing the buttons. As she shrugged it from her shoulders, her blouse pooled on the floor beside her. Next, she shimmied her stockings down over her hips to remove them, which left her standing in her window in just her bra, skirt and panties. 

****

Rey’s hand lightly caressed her breast, ghosting over her nipples, the friction of the lace of her bra heightening the sensation. Her lips parted, as her breath began to hitch. As much as she wanted to prolong his torture, she knew it wasn’t going to take her long before her climax hit her. There was no way she was going to be able to slow down. She needed it too much.

****

She watched him as he looked down at his phone - and this time instead of a text, she saw he was calling her.

She answered without speaking, just letting the hitching of her her breath travel across to him, their eyes locked on each other.

****

She allowed her hand to travel down to rest between her thighs, sliding under her panties, groaning as her hand found her engorged clit. She was so deliciously tense that the contact left her weak with desire, causing her to rest her head against the glass to brace her against its coolness. She fought the urge to close her eyes, she wanted to drink in every reaction he had to what she was doing.

****

Rey was already soaking wet, and as she moved her fingers to her entrance she whimpered as she ran her fingers along the slick of her folds, dipping them inside. The arm she was using to brace herself and hold her phone slid along the glass of the window, squeaking as it moved.

****

Curling her fingers to hit that delicious spot deep inside, the palm of her hand ground against her clit, building a furious pace as the tell tale signs of her impending orgasm began to take hold.  This was not her usual method, but was the best she could do under the circumstances - and in any case she was so worked up it didn’t seem to matter.

****

Ben placed the phone to his ear so he could hear her soft moans better, his phone picking up his own laboured breathing. 

****

She wanted him to touch himself too, she had a burning desire to see his hard cock exposed for her, to see him stroke his hand along its length. The thought sent a bolt of energy through her, causing her to press her forehead up against the window harder. A filthy, guttural moan escaped from her lips.

****

Rey saw his hand reach down to rub over his zipper, and she felt her pussy clench around her fingers tighter, the heat beginning to build. She was close.

****

“Are you hard?” She asked through clenched teeth. She had to know.

****

“Harder than I have ever been in my life,” he growled. “Fuck Rey, do you know what you  _ do _ to me? Wait till I come over there and fuck you with it.” 

****

“Please,” she huffed. “Yes.”

****

“Well, come for me Rey, and I'll be right over.”

****

It’s all she needed to push her over the edge. She let loose with a roar as bliss tore through her body, her fingers pumping and her palm grinding. She couldn’t help but close her eyes as she hit her peak. But before she did, she saw his face filled with amazement and desire. 

****

As she came back to reality, she opened her eyes to lock with his. She was panting, struggling to catch her breath.

****

“How the hell did we get from this afternoon to this?” she gasped.

****

“I don’t know how we got here. But I know how to get over there, to you, in your window. Suite 1503.... Security?” He spoke with an intensity that thrilled her.

****

Rey thought for a few moments, her head imploring her to turn away, to say no, to not risk everything for a man who only a few hours before had been needling her in a room full of people.

****

When she had pulled the blinds, in her mind she had told herself that she would pleasure herself, then shut the blinds for good. But she longed for him, and while she had told Ben that she could take care of her own pleasure, if she was honest with herself, it just wasn’t enough. 

****

She needed more.

****

She needed  _ him _ .

****

“I’ll hold the lift for you.”

****  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you enjoyed this fic, please leave kudos - or better yet - a comment. I love receiving and responding to comments, they make my day!
> 
> Chapter 4 is not too far away, so stay tuned.


	4. Curtain Call

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Windows be getting steamy. Ben and Rey shake on a truce - just not in the way you might think.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to my wonderful betas [MyJediLife](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MyJediLife) and [TazWren](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TazWren).
> 
> I hope you enjoy [LoveofEscapism](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LoveofEscapism).

Ben Solo was not at all concerned about being a successful businessman, who remained cool and calm under pressure, as he sprinted down the stairs and ran across the plaza.

****

He had been expecting to see Holdo at the briefing session earlier and was entirely unprepared, to be in such close proximity to the woman who had been occupying the majority of his thoughts over the past four weeks, when he should have been focused on winning the security contract.

****

Then, when she was pressed up against him in the lift, it was all he could do to not become hard - he really needed the blood to keep flow to his head, because there was business to be won.

****

He  _ was _ ashamed of his behaviour during that meeting. He had been frustrated that she was even there, that she worked for the enemy, that he wanted her but couldn't have her without risking it all, but he knew she wasn’t really a spy.

****

She was a victim of circumstance as much as he was. Under normal conditions he would have asked her out, taken her back to his place, made her scream under him in ecstasy over and over again. However, things were more complicated than that, and he was sorely conflicted between what his head wanted (the lucrative contract that would set First Order up for industry domination) and what his… cock - yes his cock, wanted, which was to be buried to the hilt in her pussy. And maybe to find out a bit more about her, because she fascinated him.

****

Her youthful exterior was in direct contrast to the fire that pulsed beneath it, and he had encountered it more than once. He was drawn to her passion and spirit, even if it meant being on the receiving end of text messages where she flipped him the emoji bird--like in the meeting this afternoon--which he knew he deserved.

****

Hux would kill him if he knew, leaving his career the charred remains of squandered opportunity - and the good, comfortable life he was accustomed to would be no more.

****

He saw her holding the lift door open, her blouse hastily buttoned, feet bare, breathless, with wide eyes and parted lips.

****

He strode towards her, never having seen anything more beautiful or desirable. As he reached her, he pushed her back into the lift, lifting her in his arms, pressing her against the wall of the elevator. The door closed behind them.

****

His lips scorched a trail up her throat to her jawline. The sound of her moans made his throbbing erection even harder, and he pressed up against her inner thigh so she could feel what she was doing to him. It made her gasp, her eyes as wide as saucers.

****

He captured her lips with his, his full mouth crushing hers. She tasted divine, probing his mouth with her tongue with equal fervor, her hands threading through his hair.

****

But there was something else he wanted to experience.

****

Pressing into her harder for leverage, he held her with one arm under her backside, while allowing his other hand to encase her hand - the one she had pleasured herself with. Bringing his mouth to her fingers, he growled as he tasted her arousal.

****

“Fuck….” he groaned as she began to writhe against him. Her thighs were creating a delicious friction on his cock, he could feel himself jerk and pulse in response.

****

Having licked her fingers clean, he released her hand, slowly trailing down to the apex of her thighs. She hissed and bucked against him to show how much she wanted him to touch her.

****

Pushing aside her panties, he slid two fingers inside her, he could feel how wet, hot and  _ ready _ she was.

****

“Oh, I think you’ve got some ways to go until you are fully pleasured, Rey, shall we call the experiment in my favour now, or after?”

****

He took her moans and the way her pussy clenched around his fingers to indicate she was ready to call it now.

****

“Rey, I’m still going to impale you on my cock in your window, and I’m about to make you come all over my hand before we leave this elevator. But first, I need you to know, I know you’re not a spy - I won’t say that again. And there is no way in this world you are nothing to me. To do this with you right now means I risk  _ everything _ . And it’s absolutely fucking worth it.”

****

She smiled in response, lifting his heart in his chest. He hadn’t seen it for weeks, and he'd missed it.

****

“Ben, I know you’re not a pervert… and I really like it when you watch me in my window.” she smiled shyly.

****

“I like to watch you,” he growled.

****

She giggled, then suddenly turned serious.

****

“I’m risking everything to do this with you, too. And I have nothing, just a promise of a future career. This job is my chance to do something great, and if we are doing this we need some rules.”

****

Ben’s fingers remained within her, not moving, but her pussy still clenched and pulsed around him. He was impressed that she still had the presence of mind to a initiate high stakes negotiation while in such a position. He had a feeling that if things were reversed, and she was palming his cock, he would have no capacity to do the same.

****

She continued, “No shop talk, not ever. No asking about or sharing company secrets or strategies - and no way do we  _ ever _ tell anybody what we are doing. We both do what we are paid to do, we give our work everything, and what happens between us is completely separate. If you fuck this up for me, so help me God, I will hunt you down like a dog and make you sorry you were ever born.”

****

The determined look in her eyes had him believing her.

****

“I’d shake on it, but ah,” Ben wiggled the hand holding her up under her butt and the other one buried deep in her throbbing pussy. She threw back her head and moaned with pleasure.

****

“Fuck Ben, you gotta take care of this for me,” she begged. “And why haven’t we moved?”

****

“I don’t think either of us pushed the button to take us up. Do you think you could do the honors?”

****

She lent over, still connected to him, and pushed the button to take them to the 15th floor.

****

As the lift began its ascent, Ben’s fingers started to thrust inside her, causing Rey to rock against his hand. He ground his cock up against her thigh, he had been hard since she first started to touch herself (before that, even) in her window. He ached, but he resisted the urge to rub himself against her, too much. He had his eyes on the prize - which was being sheathed within her as she moaned against glass.

****

Plunging deep inside her, he could feel the hot sear of her pulsing core, her arousal silky and welcoming. He crooked his fingers to hit the spot he knew would unravel her, and she squealed and quivered in response. He could tell that if he continued this punishing regime that she would reach nirvana in no time, and he was desperate to take her entirely.

****

The lift door opened as they reached the 15th floor, but neither were of a mind to move out. He shifted her slightly so his foot could keep the door from closing again. They weren't going anywhere until she was completely undone by his fingers.

****

Her moans and grunts began to run closer together, and he knew she was close, so he altered his technique to press up deep inside her, grinding his hand hard against her pussy.

****

“I want you to come so bad, right now. Because I really, really need to fuck you,” he moaned into her neck.

****

Her eyes snapped shut as she arched her back, unable to control the shuddering release as her pussy clenched around his fingers - the pressure he was applying to her most sensitive spot was unrelenting. A stream of profanity flowed from her mouth as she came, and he noted smugly that her reaction to his attentions seemed much,  _ much _ stronger than when receiving her own.

****

His cock throbbed harder against her, each spasm that she released travelling down through him. He had no idea how he was going to last once he was actually inside her. 

****

Sated, she slumped against him, her breath ragged and heavy. He carefully removed his fingers from inside her, resting them underneath her so she was encircled in his arms.

****

He nuzzled her cheek with a low chuckle.

****

“Fine, you win,” she murmured contentedly, as if reading his mind. “Yours was better.”

****

“Sweetheart, the best is yet to come.” 

****

Eager to get into her office, he continued to carry her as he stepped out of the lift.

****

“Which way?” Ben asked.

****

She pointed to the door at the end of the hall, her security pass dangling in her hand at the end of a lanyard.

****

He noted that while Holdo Security may have  _ excellent _ taste in employees, they were sorely lacking in the office ambiance department. 

****

Hux would give his right leg to gain access to Holdo Security headquarters, but he was reasonably confident that Hux and Rey where not a match, so it was unlikely Hux would ever get the chance.

****

Not like Rey and himself.

****

“Where’s your office,  _ mon rayon de soleil?” _

****

She lifted her head from his shoulder, a slight look of confusion displayed on her face. 

****

“Huh? Oh, it’s down there.” She pointed down the hallway. “I’m good now, you can put me down.”

****

“No,” he grunted as carried her down the corridor. She giggled, and rested her head back on his shoulder.

****

He pushed the door open with his foot, grinning as he noted the haphazard placement of her stockings and shoes on the floor.

****

“Well, well, what has been going on in here?”

****

She nipped him playfully on his neck.

****

“Ben Solo, you know full  _ well _ what’s been going on in here.”

****

Plopping Rey on her desk, he looked around.

****

“Light switch?” he asked.

****

“Over there,” she pointed. “Pussy.”

****

“Don’t tempt me,” he replied. “Plant looks good.”

****

“Yeah, like you said, it’s important to have something nice to look at while you work.”

****

“ _Mon_ _rayon de soleil,_ you will pay for that remark.”

****

“Ben, what does that mean?  _ Mon rayon de soleil?” _

****

Turning off the light, leaving them bathed in the light filtering in by the corridor, he walked over to her, tracing his fingers under her chin as he murmured into her ear. “My sunshine.”

****

“Oh,” she breathed softly.

****

Ben Solo was faced with quite the dilemma, because his cock had been hard and wanting for the larger portion of the past forty minutes. So, now that he  _ had _ the girl exactly where he wanted her, and he knew exactly what he wanted to  _ do _ to her, he was concerned that when it came to finalizing the deal, he wouldn’t be able to close it like he had intended to. 

****

_ You are the General Manager of Strategy and Communications at First Order Corporation. Come up with a plan and execute it, Solo. _

****

“You are wearing far too many clothes,” he observed, walking to her.

****

“What do you intend to do about it?” Rey asked cheekily.

****

“This,” he replied, quickly undoing the buttons on her shirt. He wanted to stroke and taste every inch of her. Her skin was soft and supple, goosebumps trailing wherever his fingers led. He smoothly reached around behind her to unclasp her bra, allowing it to fall from her chest.

****

“Beautiful,” he murmured as he lightly caressed her nipples with his hands. She whimpered, pulling him towards her with her thighs. He brought his lips softly to hers, gently caressing her with his mouth.

****

But she was having none of it, reaching around the back of his neck to press him closer to her, to kiss him harder. She removed his shirt, then moved on to undoing his pants, and he sensed her hunger and eagerness. He was desperate too, but he knew that if he returned her attentions with equal passion, things would end before they began. 

****

“So, Rey, is this a merger or an acquisition?” he chuckled, removing her hands from the waistband of his pants to kneel before her at the desk. He deftly removed her skirt, leaving her sitting at her desk in just the briefest pair of black panties. He slid his fingers along the seam, delighting in her trembling as he teased her.

****

“Acquire, merge, whatever, just fuck me,” she moaned.

****

He slid her panties to the side, marveling at her beautiful, pink, wet pussy.  He could see how swollen and ready she was, and the scent of her arousal was almost overwhelming - but not quite.

****

His nose grazed the inside of her thigh as he gazed up at her. 

****

“May I?” he inquired.

****

“Ah huh,” she squeaked in reply.

****

He knew he didn’t want to take her all the way to the end, but just enough to bring her to a pleasurable peak before he bent her over in front of the window and took her.

****

He softly licked her with a long stripe, savouring her taste. Her pussy was so hot, it was like a brand on his tongue - one he never wanted removed. She spread her legs wider as he positioned himself more closely between her legs. Her moans as he sucked ever harder at her clit let him know he was headed in the right direction. His hands remained wrapped around her thighs as he pulled her clit deeper into his mouth, completely covering her as his tongue rolled circles across it. If he had complimented his actions with his fingers, as was customary for him to do, he knew she would be completely done for in no time - so he kept at a pace that was just too much, but not nearly enough.

****

Rey began to grind against his face, and he was drunk on her moist folds. Her thighs gripped tightly around his head, and he loosened his hold on them so she could set her own tempo. He feasted on her as she began to quiver and groan.

****

“Fuck, Ben, fuck. Yes, right there, don’t move - there, please.” Her moans were music to his ears, and he increased the pressure of his mouth to bring her to completion - but not  _ too _ complete.

****

Suddenly she was jerking and pulsing around him, her hands buried in his hair as she came, bellowing his name in one long groan. He could listen to that sound all day. Spasms rocked through her, and he tasted the warm flood of her arousal as he gently decreased the pressure to prolong her pleasure but not so much as to overstimulate her. 

****

Ben felt his trademark confidence return as he watched her come down from the second orgasm he had given her in a very short time. He had this, and she was ready.

****

“Rey, it's time for me to have you now.”

****

She nodded as if a drunken stupor.

****

“ _ Mon rayon de soleil,  _ can I ask you for one small favour?”

****

She opened her eyes, one eyebrow raised in question.

****

He cleared his throat and continued. “I want to press you up against your window, and give it to you hard. Think you can handle it?”

****

She smirked. “Ben Solo, I reckon I can take all of you, every last inch. I’m so ready.”

****

With that, he grabbed her by the arm, pulling her to the window. He could make out their faces and bodies in the reflected light from the corridor.

****

_ We look good together, like we fit, _ he thought.

****

He kicked off the remainder of his clothing, coming to stand behind her completely naked, his pulsing length resting against her lower back.

****

“Just one thing left,” he said, as he slid her black panties down over her thighs, allowing her to rest against him as he moved them over her feet.

****

“Ready?” 

****

“Shut up and fuck me, Solo” she replied, pressing back against him to move up and down his cock.

****

He placed her hands up against the window, so she could brace herself, then slid his hands down along her body, to push out her delectable derriere to allow him maximum penetration. She whimpered in anticipation, watching him in the reflected glass.

****

As Ben lined his cock to her entrance, he felt her tense in anticipation and excitement. Slowly, he slid inside her, the pleasure he had already given her that evening meant she yielded entirely to his cock, easily accommodating him - but not without her feeling it, it seemed.

****

“Jesus, Ben!” she exclaimed, as he became fully seated inside her.

****

“You sure you can handle this?” he asked again.

****

“Just give me a moment,” her breath hitched.

****

He moved his hands that gripped her hips up to her lower back, gently rubbing her in circular movements to help her relax.

****

She looked down at her reflection in the window and gasped.

****

“Ben, I can see us,” she said. “I can see you inside me.”

****

Her hot pussy pulsed around him, and he took it as a invitation to start thrusting - but he needed to check first. He so badly wanted the answer to be yes.

****

“So I’m ok to…”

****

She nodded, entirely mesmerised by the way their coupling was reflected back to her in the glass.

****

He slowly started moving inside her, and her core gripped him tightly. She was hot, wet and pulsing.

****

The guttural moan that left her lips was like a lightning bolt straight to his cock, urging him to increase his tempo.

****

She slapped the glass with her hand, her warm palm leaving a print against the cooler surface of the window.

****

“More. Harder,” she growled.

****

It was the invitation he’d been waiting for.

****

He moved his hand to her shoulder, the other still gripping her hip, to brace his movements. She looked up, meeting his gaze in the window. 

****

Her mouth dropped open as he increased his thrusting. She seemed paralysed in ecstasy, a silent moan fluttering from her lips. She was so beautiful just like this, and taking her in this way, up against her window, had been all he could think about since he first saw her that day from his office.

****

But this was much, much better than he had imagined, her reactions and intensity thrilled him. He drank in her every response to his touch, from the goosebumps under his hands, to the feel of her around his cock as he slammed into her.

****

His blistering pace was having the desired effect, her hands began to drag down the glass as she started to collapse as he hammered into her. Her pussy grasped his cock, like it never wanted to let go, and he could feel her writhe and pulse around him. She was on fire, she was beautiful and right now she was his.

****

His hand on her hip circled under her to help keep her upright as she began to buck and groan. He knew she was close again (for which he gave himself a mental high five), and sensed that when the time came she would need him to help her take it.

****

“Fuck, Rey, you feel so fucking good.”

****

All she could do was moan in return.

****

He wanted to be deeper inside her, to entirely fill her up, so he raised the arm under her hip so her feet dangled over the floor. 

****

She began to garble and jerk as he entered her more deeply. Her skin under his hands became feverishly hot, almost as hot as her burning pussy. He pounded into her, but switched his movements so he remained deep inside her, the constant pressure and contact he was giving her causing her to bear down on him harder as she finally began to unravel around him.

****

Her breath was hot against the window, and as she began to gasp in ecstasy it left puffs of fog on the glass. As the tidal wave of profanity from her began he thrust into her, up to the hilt, grinding into her until he felt bliss tear through her body, and as her pussy pulsed around him she screamed out his name, arching her back and making her arms rigid against the glass.

****

She was so swollen, tight and hot, the intensity of  her climax stunned him. As she went limp in his arms, he gently placed her feet on the floor again.

****

“Are you ok if I keep going?” He rasped.

****

She nodded in response, a smile on her face. “I want you to come in me, Ben,” she said softly, still drunk from her climax.

****

Finally, Ben knew he could let go. He snapped his hips to hers, groaning as his own orgasm tore through him.  He was consumed by wave after wave of pleasure as he erupted into her. It was so powerful he needed to slam his own hand to the glass to keep them upright. It was like nothing he had ever felt before, and it burned through him like wildfire. He lost all sense of time and space as he drifted back down from his peak, with only just enough awareness to keep upright enough not to collapse on her.

****

He felt his knees start to give way as his euphoria subsided and exhausted bliss started to take hold.

****

“I’m going to lower us into to the floor, okay?” 

****

She nodded.

****

Ben carefully slid out of her, the cool air hitting him as he did. She had been so warm and inviting - he wished he could stay there forever.

****

He helped her to the floor, and she curled into a contented ball. Ben looked around for something to cover her with, finding her discarded wrap on the desk. He draped it over her, then snuggled into her to provide his own warmth. She snuggled back, burying her head in his neck. 

****

Ben gently smoothed back the hair from her forehead, peppering her with kisses as he went. 

****

“So fucking worth it”, he whispered as she drifted off to sleep in his arms. Ben soon followed after her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, thank you all for coming this far and for all the kudos and comments.
> 
> Chapter 5 should land in just over a week - lets see if our duo wake up in time. I don't think Holdo would understand somehow.


	5. The Blind Leading the Blind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things were very interesting for our two lovebirds when we last left them. Both Rey and Ben need to face each and what they did the night before - but will they have to face discovery as well?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you always to my most wonderful betas [MyJediLife](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MyJediLife) and and [TazWren](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TazWren). 
> 
> [LoveofEscapism](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LoveofEscapism), I hope you enjoy this next installment.
> 
> Everyone else - I have updated the character count from 6 to 9 - things are going to get a little too interesting to be wrapped up in one more installment.

“Rey!” The voice hissed in her ear as she was being shaken. “ _ Rey! _ ”

****

Rey rolled over, pushing the owner of the hands and voice away.

****

“Go away,” she muttered drowsily, “I’m busy.”

****

She was desperately trying to hold onto sleep, and she was sure that she would have easily drifted back into it again, if it were not for the chill across her naked body, the hard floor against her back, and the hard…

****

Sleep immediately dissipated the moment she realised that Ben Solo’s morning wood was pressed firmly against the small of her back while he tried to rouse her from her slumber.

****

She twisted her head and neck around to be absolutely certain and sure enough there, behind her, was Ben Solo in all his magnificent glory. She looked at him in bewilderment, why was he hard and why was he shaking her?

****

And why was it so darn light inside? 

****

_ And why were they still in her office?????? _

****

Panic set in as she scrambled for her phone to check the time. Finding her phone she saw it was 7.29 am, not late enough for anyone from Holdo Security to have come in, but certainly early enough for the various building security and facilities staff to have started preparing the building complex for the day’s activities.

****

“Fuck, Ben!” she exclaimed, then looked down at his impressive manhood. How in the hell did she fit  _ that  _ inside her, last night? “What the  _ fuck _ ?”

****

He looked down at his erection, and gave a sheepish shrug.

****

“It’s morning, you’re beautiful and we’re naked.” he responded.

****

She looked at him incredulously - their world was about to come crashing down around them and he was at full attention. 

****

_ The man could get hard during a bar fight _ , she thought, distractedly.

****

The passion from the evening before flooded her memory. How she had pleasured herself before him in the window, how she had held the door for him so he could plunder her with his fingers in the elevator (and win their wager hands down), and how he had feasted on her while she was splayed out across her desk. 

****

Most of all, she remembered how he had ravaged her up against her window. How it had been the most earth shattering, mind blowing, intense experience of her life. As well as one of the stupidest, most foolish, bird-brained, potentially career-limiting, high risk , impulsive decisions she had ever made.

****

“Just get dressed, Rey, come on sweetheart…” Ben urged. “ _ Please _ .”

****

Shaking last night’s memories from her mind, she followed Ben’s lead as they put on the clothes that had so carelessly been removed and flung about her office with abandon.

****

It look her a while to find her panties… located as they were in the pot plant.

****

Now both fully dressed, Ben grabbed her hand and her bag and quickly started to lead her out the door.

****

“Rey, your pass, the stairs.” He was wide eyed in panic, but still mindful enough to keep trying to prevent their detection.

****

She swiped her pass across the pad, and Ben opened the heavy stairwell door to allow her through. Fifteen long flights of stairs were descended in silence. Each flight they took brought another descent into shame, guilt and confusion for her. By the time they reached the ground floor Rey couldn’t look at him, and she couldn’t face herself.

****

She had yet to experience a walk of shame up until this point, and it was so uncomfortable she never wanted to repeat it.

****

Desperate to get away, Rey reached for the exit door that would take them out into the lobby. Ben quickly placed his hand on hers to stop her from opening it.

****

“Rey, we can't just head out - you need to check the coast is clear.” He pushed his hand through his hair nervously, “But before you do, can we just take a minute and talk?”

****

Rey started at the warm hand that enveloped hers, it felt soothing and comforting - at the same time it had her pulse thumping in her ears, and the low coil of desire twisting in the pit of her stomach. But she was resolute - her body might betray her, her heart might mislead her, but her head had to keep her firmly grounded in reality.

****

“Ben, I just want to go home and have a shower and get back into the office. I have a meeting with Amy first up, and I need to get prepared.” She inwardly cringed, worried that even the simple admission of a meeting with her boss could be enough to compromise Holdo Security’s chance of securing the government contract they were trying so hard to win.

****

He let go of her hand sharply, and even though she wasn’t looking at him she could feel his eyes burning into her, searching her face. But she couldn’t meet them, she just didn’t trust herself. 

****

“Okay…” he spoke slowly, deliberately as if trying to to coax a frightened animal away from danger, “Can we talk later?” 

****

Those eyes still bore into her, but she didn’t respond.

****

“ _ Please _ .” His voice was soft and gentle, but the intensity of his inflection told her how desperately he wanted her to say yes.

****

Against her better judgment, she lifted her eyes to meet his… and melted. In those eyes she didn’t see her corporate mortal enemy, or a mistake, or a bastard, all she saw was a pair of soft brown eyes pleading with her to not shut him out completely.

****

Plus, the image of him naked was permanently scorched in her brain.

****

“Fine,” she agreed reluctantly. “Later.”

****

“I’ll send you a text with the place. I just need to make the arrangements.”

****

“Place? Ben!” She didn’t think she was agreeing to a face to face meeting.

****

“Just trust me.” Those eyes held her again.

****

“Okay, Ben, just go. I’ll head out in a minute.” Her voice softened somewhat. Refusing those eyes was impossible.

****

Ben looked relieved, but only slightly. “Thank you. Can you check the coast is clear?”

****

Rey carefully ducked her head out into the lobby, relieved that it was empty.

****

“All clear,” she said, turning back to him. 

****

They stared at each other, their parting hung heavy between them, neither knowing quite how to end it. Rey broke first, stepping out of the way of the door.

****

Ben hesitated for a moment, then with a light brush of his hand across her cheek, he was gone.

****

__________

****

Rey returned to the office an hour later and, while the physical evidence of the night before had been washed away, the memory of his touch, his breath on her skin and the sound of his voice as he came still lingered.

****

She greeted Finn at the front desk,as per usual. She tried to remember how she usually behaved, trying desperately to act like everything was normal when, in fact, everything had changed. 

****

“Hi Finn,” she squeaked, not sounding at all as casual as she had intended.

****

“Hey Rey,” Finn smiled. “Amy is in her office and waiting for you,” he dropped his voice as he spoke. “You’re late… but she seems to be in a good mood.”

****

Rey knew she had taken far longer than she had intended, but she had to be sure there was no evidence of the night before on her appearance. Thank goodness Ben didn’t seem the type for love bites.

****

She headed to her office quickly, to drop off her bag and grab her notes from the day before. She knew Amy would want all the dirt from the meeting she attended yesterday. Rey was absolutely prepared to give her everything she had gotten, minus several key omissions - of course.

****

She did a quick inventory as she walked into her office, looking for tell tale signs of last night’s activities. 

****

She surveyed the room.

****

_ My desk,  _ she blushed, would she ever be able to concentrate at her desk ever again, with the vision her sitting on it with Ben’s head between her legs, sucking, licking and tasting her. Her pussy clenched at the memory.

****

_ My office _ , she continued, I _ still have my office, and everything seems a bit messy, but otherwise all okay. _

****

_ My job _ , she reminded herself,  _ I still have my job _ .

****

_ My win… holy mother of God - my window!!!   _ Her hand flew to her mouth in sickening  horror, for her blinds where still open, and there, in plain sight, were the unmistakable, enormous and undeniably masculine sweaty hand prints of Ben Solo. Accompanied by her much smaller, more feminine, dainty ones.

****

She dove for the cord in blind panic, causing them to come down with a loud thud. She closed her eyes, resting her forehead against it. Her breathing was ragged and shallow, and tears pricked behind her eyelids.

****

She had fucked up, big time.

****

She made a mental note to find some window cleaner as soon as her meeting with Amy had finished - which she really, really needed to go to - as she had left Amy waiting far too long already.

****

Finn came running into the room, concern radiating from his face.

****

“Rey! I heard a crash, is everything alright?” He asked.

****

“Finn… everything’s fine, just pulled the blind a little hard, that’s all. Nothing’s wrong.” She could hear herself babbling, but the panic was so high in her throat, she wasn’t able to respond any differently.

****

“Rey… are you okay?” He asked. Her demeanor and words had done nothing to assuage his worry. “You seem… different today. Not like your usual self.”

****

“Seriously Finn, I’m  _ fine _ .” 

****

She wasn’t.

****

“Like you said, I’m running late - so I better go.” 

****

With that, she picked her notes that were strewn across the floor (how the hell did it get there, she wondered, then remembered it had been placed on the desk and then hastily shoved out of the way so Ben could feast on her), and grabbed a pen. She accidently pushed past Finn as she headed to Amy’s office. She didn’t mean to, but like everything else this morning,she was off kilter, out of step, out of sorts and it seemed… almost out of luck. 

****

She did her best to compose herself before heading into Amy’s office, plastering a bright smile across her face before entering the room, the way she smoothed the imaginary wrinkles of her dress the only thing betraying her nervousness.

****

“Rey!” Amy beamed at her. 

****

_ Finn was right, Amy is in a good mood today _ , Rey observed.

****

“Hi Amy, how was your travel? So sorry you were delayed and had to miss the briefing.”

****

Much to Rey’s surprise, Amy brushed her commiserations aside.

****

“Eh, those briefing sessions are usually a waste of time, nobody says anything interesting, just in case they play their strategy in front of the competition.”

****

Rey was perplexed, this Amy was entirely different from the Amy Rey was used to. She wondered what the reason was.

****

“Although, a little bird told me that the First Order was there, and Ben Solo completely lost his shit, yelling and carrying on, accusing the competition of spying. Can you believe it? I mean, if anyone is going to be committing corporate espionage, it's the First-Freaking-Order.” Amy laughed at her own joke.

****

Rey did her best to laugh in step with Amy, although to her own ears it rang hollow and empty. Fear was truly creeping into her heart now, and she was consumed with guilt over the knowledge that Ben Solo had been referencing her when he made the spying comment. 

****

Rey was confident in the knowledge that if Amy knew that Ben had been referencing Rey at the briefing, and that he had slept in her office the night before - after completely and utterly ruining her with an intensity she didn’t think possible… well - she knew without a shadow of a doubt that her desk, office, window and   _ job _ would be ripped from her without hesitation. 

****

She would deserve it, too. 

****

Not only was she engaged with the enemy, but she had bought him home to base camp.

****

At the same time, a notion drifted through the back of her mind. Ben Solo had been a complete ass at the briefing, trying to provoke her as he did (and succeeding, she admitted) - but he had been far from losing it. Truth be told, he had seemed as cool as a cucumber through the entire thing.

****

The tumble of her thoughts continued, like a coil unraveling in her mind.

****

Rey also wondered - just who was this little bird Amy was referring to? She had understood that she was the only representative from Holdo Security at the meeting.

****

Nothing,  _ nothing  _ was making sense this morning, she thought mournfully.

****

Rey shuffled her notes, trying to make some kind of order from them, but what she really wanted was to wad them into balls, stuff them into her mouth and just  _ scream _ in frustration.

****

Because, she knew, deep down, even though every part of this morning had been agonisingly uncomfortable, and that she was in way over her head, when it came to the crunch, she was as much in Ben’s gravitational pull as he was in hers. 

****

“So, do you want my notes from yesterday?” Rey was eager to find an even keel again. At least she could take  _ notes _ without fucking it up.

****

But to her surprise, Amy dismissed her notes with a wave of her hands. 

****

“Write it up and send it to me.” She said. “I have an important call to take right now, and it’s something that could be a game changer,” Amy gave Rey a conspiratorial wink at her last statement.

****

Rey furrowed her brow in consternation; there was  _ more _ she didn’t know? Exhausted by the shadows, intrigue and subterfuge, Rey stood and headed back to her office.

****

Just as she crossed the threshold into the corridor, Amy ended their conversation with a parting shot that chilled Rey to the bone.

****

“Oh Rey,” she said breezily. “My little bird also told me that you left the briefing session in an awful hurry, and that you seemed quite upset.” She paused for effect, and her tone turned darker. “If, and I mean,  _ if _ , you were given the opportunity to represent my company again - I wouldn’t want a repeat performance… understand?”

****

Rey nodded dumbly, rendered mute in terror and mortification that her reaction to Ben’s spy dig had been so obvious.

****

Rey couldn’t get back to her desk fast enough.

__________

****

Sitting at the desk again (after causally cleaning the highly incriminating evidence from her window), it might have  _ seemed  _ like Rey was engrossed in her work. However, if her colleagues had looked closely, they would have noticed how frequently her eyes drifted to the screen of her phone, in addition to looking across to the window. 

****

While she only had the slats open just slightly, she had noticed Ben’s window was presented much the same. Open enough to create an awareness of the other person across the way, but not enough to draw attention to it from a bystander.

****

_ There had been plenty enough near misses on that front this morning _ , Rey reminded herself grimly.

****

Even though they couldn’t actually see each other, she found it oddly comforting all the same. She was frustrated with herself for still longing for his attention, but felt it impossible to do anything different.

****

So, she had to be content watching her phone with an eagle eye. She told herself it was so she could quickly catch his message before one of her colleagues could see it. However, if she was willing to be completely honest with herself, it was because she desperately wanted contact from him.

****

Disappointment had begun to settle low in her stomach. It was almost midday, and although her memory told her that he had meant it when he said he wanted to see her later today, her phone told her otherwise.

****

Just when she had all but given up, her phone sprang to life. 

****

_ Why the fuck couldn’t he text like a normal person, _ she thought in exasperation.

****

Playing it cool, she cradled the phone in her hand, answering it just before it went to her voicemail.

****

“Hello?” She attempted to speak casually, but the crack in her voice told another story.

****

“Rey, I’m about to send you a code and a map to the rear entrance of my building. From there use the code again to come down to the basement. I’ll be waiting for you.” His voice was deep and melodic, almost hypnotic in its tempo. The reminder of how it had sounded as he came in her drifted through her mind like a tune in a music box. 

****

A filthy, sexy, debauched music box.

****

“Ben, are you sure it’s safe?” She said, her doubt clear from her tone.

****

“Rey, trust me, it’s fine, I’ve made the arrangements, you won’t be seen.” 

****

“How do you know?” It’s still wasn’t clear to her how entering the depths of the lion’s den could possibly be a good idea.

****

He paused “.....I’ve done this before, I know the building staff and their price. And that’s probably as much as you want to know.”

****

The inference was clear, Ben was well practiced in sneaking the opposite sex into his building undetected.

****

She huffed at the idea of being in the same group as some …  _ strumpet... _ desperate to spend a lunch break banging Ben Solo in his car. The heat rising through her core seemingly ignored her outrage, however.

****

“Fine,” she conceded through gritted teeth, “But no funny business, just talking.”

****

“As you wish.” was his reply. 

****

With that, they both hung up.

****

__________

****

On the way over, Rey had herself completely convinced that it was just  _ talking _ she and Ben were about to engage in.

****

To work things out.

****

To come up with a plan to save their jobs and avoid the whole mistake that was last night from blowing up in their faces.

****

Absolutely, positively, not in any way, shape, or form to fuck. 

****

Absolutely not.

****

But, as per usual, the sight of Ben Solo waiting for her in the basement was enough to undo all her chaste and noble intentions.

****

_ Shit _ , she muttered to herself.

****

Not saying a word, he took her by the hand as he threaded a path through the parked cars, each one worth at least three times her annual salary.

****

His hand around her wrist burned like fire, setting her skin alight. She knew she couldn’t be alone with him in an enclosed space. Her willpower just wasn’t that strong.

****

As they came to what she assumed was his (expensive, large, sleek) car, she stopped dead in her tracks.

****

“I’m not getting in there with you, no way, no how, Solo,” she shook her head vehemently.

He looked at her in surprise. “Rey, sweetheart, we can’t stay out here,” he said, bewildered.

****

“No, Ben, it’s  _ not happening _ .” She refused to budge.

****

“There’s nowhere else for us to go,  _ mon rayon de soleil _ . This is the only place.” His tone was a little softer, but the pleading look in his eyes remained.

****

“Well, it sucks,” she said, though internally she was melting like a snow cone on a hot summer’s day. 

****

She knew the longer they stayed out there arguing about it, the more likely it was that they would be detected.

****

“Fine,” she huffed. “You get in the back seat, and I’ll get in the front. Remember,  _ no funny business _ .” 

****

He raised his hands in surrender as he opened the passenger side door to let her in. She took in her surroundings while he hopped into the back seat. It was all plush and leather and buttons and luxury. Very, very comfortable, and very, very  _ intimate _ .

****

She shoved her nervousness back down into her stomach and tried to squash herself back into the corner of the cabin, attempting to put as much distance as possible between herself and the man that had taken her so completely the night before.

He positioned himself directly behind her in the back seat, his head craning around to look at her.

****

It was far too close for comfort. Her heart inside her chest was twisting and turning in nervous anticipation.  The potiential of what could happen hung in the air, unspoken - but every fibre of her being pulsing in awareness.

****

Out of the frying pan and into the fire, it seemed.

****

She pointed to the far corner of the back seat. “Over there, and put your hands where I can see them.” Rey crossed her arms across her chest defensively.

****

His hands once again raised in mock surrender, and slid over to the far side of the seat. The action did little to bring her temperature down. He was still there, he was still larger than life, he was still as sexy as hell, and he was still looking at her in a mixture of confusion and desire.

****

“So, what did you want to talk about?” she asked pensively.

****

“Well for starters, last night,” he replied evenly.

****

“Last night was a big mistake,” she spat with a force that surprised even herself.

****

“No,” he said firmly with a shake of his head.

****

“ _ No? _ ” she asked incredulously.

****

“No,” he repeated. “It may have been impetuous, risky, foolish and laden with the potential for catastrophe, but... it wasn't a mistake.” He shook his head again, his lips pursed together. “Not even close.”

****

She was taken back by his conviction, her brow furrowed as she processed what he was saying.

****

“So it’s a disaster waiting to happen… but not a mistake?” She repeated back to him.

****

“Correct,” he affirmed.

****

“Your risk appetite is way bigger than mine..” she replied.

****

“Wrong again,” he shot back. “The woman who pleasured herself in front of me last night - in a flagrant power play - knows as much about risk and reward as I do. But you doubt yourself, which means you fold when you should up the ante.”

****

She stared at him, wondering how on earth he could see into her like that when he hardly knew her.

****

“So, where to from here?” She asked, raising her chin a little in a show of defiance.

****

“Well, last night, I believe we… shook on a deal.”

****

“Reacquaint me with the terms,” she replied.

****

“No shop talk.”

****

“Yes,” she agreed.

****

“Company secrets are a no-go,” he continued.

****

“Non negotiable.”

****

“What happens between us remains between us only.”

****

She nodded, smiling despite herself. She could feel the binds around her resolve unravelling. She knew she was done for.

****

He crept a little closer, closing the distance between them as he sensed their deal was about to be fully brokered.

****

“We give our work  _ everything _ ,” he said, his voice becoming low and thick with desire. His broad shoulders filled the space between the front seats, she could reach out and touch him if she wanted to.

****

And she did want to, very much, just not before all the terms and conditions had been settled on.

****

“Don't forget, if you fuck this up for me, I will come for you, and it won’t be pleasant,” she reminded him sagely.

****

“Yes, I recall that clause quite vividly,” he chuckled.

****

He stuck out his hand. “Deal?”

****

“No,” she said, her eyes locked to his.

****

“No?” It was his turn to be surprised.

****

“No more…  _ meetings _ in my office. This morning was just too close for comfort, and then when I returned later, I realised your bloody handprints were all over my goddamn window!”

****

His eyebrows shot up in surprise. “Oh… I see. Yes, that won’t do at all.” He nodded. “Agreed.” 

****

He stuck out his hand a little further, while closing the distance between them a little more again. “Deal?” He repeated “... _ please _ .” His voice was like a whisper, his large hand shaking just ever so slightly.

****

She slowly reached out her hand, and saw his shoulders relax in relief. His hands, just like before, were soft, enveloping and comforting, while at the same time hinting at the promise of the pleasure only such large hands could deliver.

****

She looked down at her hand, enclosed in his. He wasn’t so much shaking her hand as holding it, his thumb stroking her palm in a soft, circulator motion. It sent a warm wave of energy through her, and she wondered how on earth she was going to survive him when just the mere stroke of his hand was enough to reduce her to a puddle on the floor.

****

“Please…,” she whispered, moving closer to seek his lips. “Don’t destroy me. Don’t take everything.” 

****

“No...no.... _ mon rayon de soleil, _ ” he crooned, attempting to soothe her as he reached to stroke her hair. “Don’t worry, Rey… I feel it too.”

****

“This morning, the lies, the hiding, the fear. It’s horrible, I can’t  _ live _ like that.” She needed him to understand that this was never going to be easy for her, it was never going to feel right while the rivalry between First Order and Holdo Security remained in play.

****

It was ironic that the one who had the power to take what she held most dear was the one she would turn to when she needed comfort about it.

****

“Help me to forget,” she whispered.

****

She could feel his breath hot on her cheek, he was so close. Later, she wouldn’t be able to recall if he had pulled her on top of him, or if she had jumped. All she knew was that she was suddenly straddling him in the back seat of his car, about to close a deal she didn't know she had the collateral to cover.

****

They crashed together, a tangle of limbs, lips and tongues, devouring each other as she ground her pelvis down into him. She clutched his face in her hands as her mouth came down, hot and hard, onto his. His lips were soft, yet hungry, seeking to possess her. She yielded, while at the same time seeking out her own need, the heat in her core desperately signalling for fulfillment. 

****

She could feel her arousal pooling within her as the aching desire to have him inside her took hold entirely.

****

That morning, in the harsh light of her office, she had been overwhelmed by just how large he was. But right now, in the intimacy of his car, their moans echoing around them, it was all she wanted.

****

“How long do you have?” He moaned, his hands squeezing and rolling over her nipples as she rubbed herself against his muscular thighs.  She could feel how hard he was, as he ground against her stomach, straining to reach her through his pants. 

****

“Long enough,” she panted, pulling herself back so she could remove her panties. She placed them carefully on the front seat. She was not fond of the notion of scrambling around in the dim light of the car to find them later - she remembered the pot plant discovery from earlier this morning.

****

Following her lead, he undid his pants, freeing his rock hard length so she could mount him.

****

Her eyes widened at the sight. 

****

“Fuck Ben….” she exhaled, her eyes wild with passion, her lips red and swollen from their embrace. “My… what a big cock you have.”

****

He seemed to puff up a little in the chest, clearly pleased by her adulation.

****

“All the better to fuck you with,  _ mon rayon de soleil, _ ” he said, a wolfish grin spreading across his face.

****

She pounced again, eager to have him inside her. She remembered how good and  _ right _ the stretch of him inside her had felt the night before. She didn’t understand how Ben made her feel this way, how he transformed her from an upstanding member of the community, into some…  _ strumpet _ who was willing to spend her lunch break banging Ben Solo in the back seat of his car. 

****

She didn’t understand it - but she knew she  _ really _ liked it.

****

As she straddled him again, she lined her entrance up over his cock. It pulsed warm, delightfully smooth and hard beneath her, and the guttural growl that came from her as she held it steady so she could lower herself down on it spoke to how much touching him like that thrilled her. Just as before, once she was impaled on him, even though she was completely ready to get things in motion, she needed a moment to adjust to his size. It was a pleasurable pain, his first entry into her, like roughly scratching an itch that had been driving her wild for a long, long time. Just as before, he gently rubbed her lower back in soft circular motions, to comfort her and help her to relax.

****

She considered Ben as she waited for her body to loosen and meld around him, and it occurred to her that, if she wanted to, she could take the lead in what they were about to do.

****

Last night’s interlude passed across her memory fevered haze, where Ben had been in charge, the one making the ( _ very welcomed, utterly mind blowing _ ) plays. While she had enjoyed each moment, each lick of pleasure he had wrung from her body and mind, she wondered what it would be like to be the one calling the shots. A thought that was immediately shoved to the side as far too risky, much too dangerous - there was no way she could dominate the raw power that was Ben Solo.

****

She felt her core relax and open, which allowed her to sink deeper so he became fully seated within her. Ben rolled his head back with pleasure, his eyes closed and lips slightly parted. She noticed that he lay still beneath her, in stark contrast to the dominance and power he had shown her last night.

****

Placing her hands on his shoulders, Rey slowly began to glide up and down his hard length, he consumed her as she enveloped him. His hands were still resting gently, but firmly, on her backside, but he didn’t direct her movements or tempo - he was leaving it to her to set the pace.

****

She remembered his words from earlier in the conversation, when he told her that she was just as capable of making strategic decisions as he was - but that when the chips were down she faltered and withdrew, when really she should up the ante.

****

_ Let’s see if he’s right _ , she told herself. But she had to make it fast, because there wasn’t much time.

****

She grabbed a fistful of his hair, using it as leverage to yank back his head further. His throat was exposed to her, like prey to a predator, and his eyes stared up at her, heavy with desire.

****

She resisted the urge to mark him, and even though she desperately wanted to - she had the feeling that once she brought that into play she’d be wearing turtlenecks and scarves even in the deepest heat of summer.

****

She continued to piston up and down his length, her movements gathering speed to match the excitement exploding through her as she sensed he was willing for her -and she was able - to take the lead.

****

“Solo, this time I’m going to call the shots.” She kept her tempo the same, she needed his consent and agreement before she continued.

****

His lazy, yet smug smile urged her on. She decided she was going to wipe it from his beautiful face by the time she was done with him.

****

“This time,  _ I’m _ the one that’s going to take  _ you _ . Think you can handle it?”

****

He chuckled, clearly confident he could take whatever she could dish out.

****

“Rey, my little firecracker, I can handle whatever you are willing to give me.”

****

Now that his consent was confirmed, it was time to get to work.

****

This time, on her next downward thrust she kept him fully seated in her, using her hips to rotate him inside her for much needed friction. She clenched down on him… hard.

****

A strangled cry left his lips as he felt the almost painful (but not quite) pressure of her core constricting around him. She felt it too, how his hardness felt more… complete within her. In contact with every inch of her. Except that she knew it was coming, and he didn’t, so she embraced the increased intensity while Ben’s only response was to grip her harder with his hands.

****

She could feel him trying to set her tempo with his hands, to guide her movements. But she was having none of it. 

****

“Don’t even think about it, Solo,” she growled. “You are going to take it my way.”

****

His hands instantly relaxed, and the thrill of having him fall in line spurred her on further.

****

She moved her hands to his face, straightening his head to align with hers so she could look directly into his eyes as she spoke to him. 

****

“Solo, you feel so fucking good in my cunt.” she said.

****

“Yes..” he stammered. She could feel the tension rising within him, she knew he wanted to fuck up into her, but had been forbidden from doing so. His grunts punctuated each of her downward thrusts, expelled from him as their bodies slapped together.

****

“I can feel you so deep inside me, fucking so high and hard up in me. I’ve never felt this part of me before, never.”

****

“You’ve never felt your g-spot before?” he huffed. “ _ Bullshit _ , I hit that hard last night.”

****

“Shut up Solo, that’s not the key takeaway here,” she quickly retorted, although she had a hazy memory that maybe he was right. In any case that wasn’t the point - this was the first time she had identified it for herself and was deliberately chasing it.

****

She thought she heard him mutter something about setting up camp there later, but she couldn’t be sure.

****

Different sensations were beginning to flood her body, curling up through her pelvis, to her stomach and up to her chest. She felt something...  _ intense _ building within her, and she clamped down hard on him again - and this time her stuttered moan met his strangled cry, because the pleasure of it was overwhelming and no amount of mental pep talk could prepare her for it.

****

“Rey,” he moaned. “Shit, that feels so good, you need to come baby, because I’m really close.”

****

“No,” she responded. She knew it would kill him if she didn’t come first, and she wanted to toy with him a little longer.

****

“No, baby, sweetheart - you really,  _ really _ need to come, I can’t hang on much longer.” 

****

His eyes pleaded with her, and it seemed that she could indeed dominate the raw power of Ben Solo - but only because he wanted her to.

****

“You’re still holding on, let go,” he whispered.

****

She opened her mouth to utter another refusal, but it was snatched from her as he brought his hand to the back of her head, forcing her forward to crush his lips with hers. It was an outward act of… domination, but when coupled with the softness of his kiss and the way he cradled her head in his hands, it was enough to send that intense feeling building in her pelvis into the stratosphere. When he suddenly started to thrust up into her, hitting that newly discovered exquisite place buried deep inside, it was all she needed to unravel.

****

He held her head in place as she screamed into his mouth as her orgasm took hold - she was momentarily paralysed with bliss and she was relieved when he was easily able to take the reins when she was incapable of doing so. Wave after powerful wave rocketed through her, and she felt like the pressure would erupt out of the top of her head. It was as powerful as the one from the night before, but somehow different. The feeling of his cock thrusting inside her as she came was beyond exquisite, she didn’t know it could be like this - yet somehow feel at the same time that it was the only way it should be.

****

She drifted down from her climax, but for some reason she didn’t feel quite… finished.

****

Pursuing the pleasure that still lay within her, she drove down hard against him again, the explosion of their matching, yet opposite thrusts forcing another wave of ecstasy after she had already hurdled through the first. This time he let go of her head so he could watch her chase it, as she writhed and moaned above him. From under her heavy lids she could see he was smiling up at her.

****

Finally, the intensity of her peak washed away, leaving a warm, golden glow that radiated through her. She slowed down her movements to catch her breath, keenly award that he was also close to his own release, and she wanted to pull the move made him tip over the edge.

****

“You did so well, baby,” he crooned, softly kissing her lips. “You were so beautiful just now.”

****

Somewhere in the back of her mind it rattled that she should be the one to praise in this scenario, to tell him how good he had been. But her heart didn’t mind, and happiness bloomed within her chest that he thought she did  _ good _ .

****

She basked in the feeling for a few moments more, but the urgency to ruin him began to outpace her afterglow as she continued to glide along his length.

****

Having recovered far quicker than she had anticipated, she anchored herself to him once again, clamping down hard to increase the pressure. She winced slightly, tender from her own bliss just minutes before, but she soon forgot her discomfort as she realised just how hard Ben was, spurred by her own orgasm.

****

“Don’t you move,” she warned. 

****

He quickly nodded his agreement, his hands back on her ass again.

****

She squeezed harder again, but instead of thrusting she ground down on his cock, rolling it inside her. The filthy moan that erupted from his mouth let her know she was absolutely on the right track. 

****

With his cock clamped down deep within her core, it only left his limbs and torso to take the power of his orgasm as he shuddered his release. His body jerked and stuttered like an electric current charged through it, alternately going stiff, then thrashing before the next wave took hold. 

****

He bellowed as he spilled into her. She was reasonably confident that the entire basement, and the first ten floors of the building, had received the memo that Ben Solo had just been seriously ruined in the back seat of his car by the one woman he shouldn’t be doing the horizontal mambo with.

****

Rey sat back, elated, shocked…  _ proud _ that she had achieved what she had set out to do - control Ben Solo like he was a marionette and she was the puppeteer.

****

_ “Knew you had it in you,” _  he panted, trying to regulate his breath and pulse.

****

It occurred to her that praise for him was needed too.

****

“Ben,” she said softly, as she stroked his face. “You were amazing, you knew exactly what to do. Thank you.”

****

The goofy smile that erupted as a result of her words was the greatest reward she had ever received. He brought her in for a closer embrace, his arms enveloped her - the hardness of his body somehow making way for her softness.

****

They remained entwined together that way for several minutes. As much as she wanted to remain wrapped up in his arms and the safe cocoon of his car, she knew she had get back to the office before she was missed - especially when she was already late from this morning.

****

Her work/(sex) life balance was completely out of whack. 

****

She shifted to uncouple them, causing a slight grunt from Ben. The evidence of their passion pooled within her, and she knew she definitely was going to need to freshen up before she returned to her desk.

****

The idea of having Ben’s cum in her while she casually went about her afternoon meeting schedule thrilled her - a filthy little secret only she and Ben knew.

****

And anyone Ben might have in his car in the next 24 hours…. because his lovely, luxurious automobile  _ reeked _ of sex.

****

She was shocked at the utter debauchery of her thoughts. Since when was she  _ like _ this?

****

“I have to get back, is it safe?” she said as she reached over to retrieve her panties from the front seat of the car.

****

“I arranged for an hour, so yes, the coast should be clear. Don’t forget the code, it’s my private one.”

****

He gave her his  _ personal code _ ? 

****

“That’s a bold move, Solo,” she stated, one eyebrow raised as she slipped her panties back on.

****

“Baby, I’m full of bold moves.” Ben said, leaning in to plant a soft kiss on her lips. “Here’s another - stay with me tonight.”

****

It was completed unexpected, overwhelming and the idea of spending all night wrapped in Ben’s arms (amongst other things) was the most delicious invitation she’d ever received.

****

“Yes,” she sighed.

****

“I’ll arrange a service. My private service, not the company one,” he reassured her.

****

As she clambered out of the back seat to open the door, he gave her a playful swat on her backside. 

****

“Enjoy the rest of your day, Sunshine, and don’t be thinking of me too much… or too little.”

****

She turned to give him a reproachful look - because of the swat and because of the comment.

****

“You’ll keep, Solo,” she growled, and then she twisted to whisper in his ear, “and you’ll pay for that later.”

****

__________

****

_ A potential disaster for sure _ , she told herself on the way back to the office.

****

_ But not a mistake.  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you everyone for the comments and kudos - it's just a blast to hear that you are enjoying this story.


	6. Blind Ambition

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When we last left our lovebirds, things were looking up, Ben’s car needed a steam clean and life was good. Well, with the arrival of a new player, their #itscomplicated has escalated to #ohcraptotallycomplicated. 
> 
> Some big reveals in this chapter - hope they were worth the journey.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you always to my most wonderful betas [MyJediLife](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MyJediLife) and and [TazWren](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TazWren).
> 
> [LoveofEscapism](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LoveofEscapism), I hope you enjoy this next installment.

Ben Solo meant it when he said he was going to set up camp at Rey’s G-Spot.

****

His new favourite morning activity was to cradle Rey against his chest, while his fingers were buried deep inside her pussy.

****

Over the past few weeks, since their session in the car, it had become a delicious ritual - her nestled against him and him, taking care of her, making her feel good. Showing her what her body could do.

****

Rey in turn, also delighted in waking Ben with her own version of a carnal alarm clock, putting his morning wood to proper use, with his fists in her hair as she took the length of him in her mouth. She hadn’t known she could do that either, but with Ben she wanted to explore and test - and try - many things. To challenge herself, of course, because what is life without a challenge?

****

On the mornings, when he woke first, Ben would start by gathering her in his arms and lightly peppering her face and neck with kisses. As she roused, he would watch her stretch the length of her body to iron out the sleep kinks, unable to stop himself from gliding his hands over her smooth, toned skin.

****

She would give a little nod, allowing her knees to drop apart to show him that she was ready, and that she wanted him to touch her there. 

****

Ben would start with gently cupping her between her legs, rubbing his fingers along her folds and up to her clit, lubricating his fingers and her swollen, red pussy lips. He would continue like this for some time, feeling as she became slippery and engorged with arousal.

****

Just when she couldn’t take it anymore, when she began to writhe and beg and moan for him to plunge into her, he would rub his fingers around her entrance, preparing her for what was to come.

****

The first few strokes inside her were always smooth and gentle, to let her become accustomed to the stretch of his thick fingers. Then, when he was sure she was consumed with the need for more, he would crook his fingers to stimulate the sensitive spot inside her. The spot that, if stroked and pressed in  _ just _ the right way, could keep her in the throes of orgasmic ecstasy for a very long time.

****

When he could feel her begin to pulse against him, experience told him that she was ready for more, so then he would change from a thrust  to a rock, applying constant pressure while crooking his fingers, his palm providing glorious friction against her clit.

****

She could feel him drinking in every response and reaction that he was responsible for, taking in each sound - from her ragged whimpers as she came down from a high, to her deep guttural bellows - as another orgasm tore through her.

****

His fingers vibrated against her as she climaxed, his dulcet voice crooning in her ear that she was such a good girl, that she was doing so well, that she was so beautiful when she came.

****

As promised, after they had restruck their deal in the basement of his office building, Ben had a car service come and collect her after she had finished work. It was surreal - like being transported to another world. A world which consisted of his apartment and just the two of them - and his bed.

****

In this world, there was no security contract to be won, deal to be made, competitor to destroy. It was just them.

****

Rey decided that as thrilling (if she was really,  _ really _ honest with herself) as semi public sex was for her, it didn’t even come close to having him make love to her in his bed - then waking up safe in his arms then next morning. Where there wasn’t a hard floor at her back, but a very hard man instead.

****

So, if making him “pay” for his boldness in the car, she meant begging him to impale her on his cock while she came around him - Ben Solo could consider himself paid up in full.

****

Sometimes she would whisper it was too intense, too much, and he’d back away while still cupping her, listening for the regulation of her breath, and then slowly starting to move again. 

****

Sometimes she would be sure that she wouldn't be able to come again, but then he would whisper to her that he knew she could.

****

He was always right.

****

They could keep this up for a long time, Ben bringing Rey to orgasm over and over again in this way until she just couldn't take it any longer, begging him to replace his fingers with his cock.

****

She had laughed in delight at the grand presentation of the toothbrush. 

****

In what she would some to know as typical Ben Solo, that morning after her first night in his bed, he had headed out on the pretense of getting their morning coffee, leaving her to pad around his sumptuous apartment. 

****

On his return, he dragged her into the bathroom to present her with her very own electric toothbrush, identical to his. With a flourish he set it up to charge, and then, much to her delight, then proceeded to take her on the bathroom benchtop next to it. Then her giggles had melted into moans and whimpers - and eventually into screams of ecstasy.

****

Since it was far too risky to attempt going out, most of their time together had been spent holed up in his apartment.

****

Talking, touching, tasting and  _ taking _ each other.

****

Lots of talking. Lots of taking.

****

So it was that morning, as they lay together basking in their afterglow, that Rey decided it was time to find out a little bit more about what made Ben Solo tick.

****

“So,” she said. “Would it be a break of our agreement if you told me how you got started with the First Order?”

****

“No..” he said softly, nuzzling her cheek. “But maybe you wouldn’t think that much of me after I tell you.”

****

Rey was indignant.

****

“Ben, nothing could change the way I feel about you.  _ Nothing _ ,” she cupped his face in her hands, looking at him intently. It was as close as she could get to confessing how much he meant to her in the moment - and the depth of her feelings for him was frightening. He held her whole heart in his hand, with the ability to either cradle it and keep her safe, or crush it and leave her devastated.

****

_ Risky, a potential disaster, but not a mistake, _ she reminded herself.

****

His eyes shifted from hers, and he drew in a deep breath.

****

“Well, the Skywalker family, my mother’s family, actually had a long history of protecting the nation and its interests -  my grandfather, my mother, my uncle. When Skywalker Security had my grandfather at the helm, it was truly something. He saw vast opportunity and the need for industry domination in order to secure the future of the company. At one stage, Skywalker Security was the leading provider of security services, with contracts that included protecting diplomatic attaches as well as other, more… covert missions.”

****

Rey listened intently, held fast by the realisation that Ben was sharing something deeply personal to him, something he kept hidden in the dark. Something he was reluctant to bring to the light.

****

“When my grandfather died, my uncle took control. I started there when I was just out of college, eager to learn the family business. Only it was no longer the family business that I remembered. Skywalker Security had become too narrow, too focused and too… selective to expand and be great. To become what it was truly meant to be. The voice in my head, my intuition, was telling me there was more to be had. Bigger and better contracts.”

****

“So... I fought with my uncle, tried to convince him to move beyond the old ways. To build something new - with me. But he refused, staying stuck in the past, clinging to his lofty ideals and his unyielding principles. Unable to see that in business, to win - to succeed - principles and ideals need to bend.”

****

Ben shifted uncomfortably against her, as Rey grappled with the notion that being principled could be a  _ bad _ thing. Rey kept her face neutral as Ben continued. She wasn’t sure where Ben was headed, but a thousand pinpricks of fear rained down on her conscience. 

****

“As time went on, things became worse. I wanted to make Skywalker Security truly  _ great _ , as powerful as it was meant to be. I secured a highly lucrative contract as security protection for a civilian contractor envoy in a highly… controversial civil war. Uncle Luke was furious, he threatened to cast me out of the company. Out from my own  _ birthright _ .”

****

Rey saw his eyes darken from the memories he was sharing with her, the pain still there and raw, as if he was talking about yesterday, not several years earlier.

****

“So I did what I had to do, what I felt was  _ right _ . The first action I took was bringing the deal  to First Order Security, who saw the opportunity and  _ jumped _ at it.”

****

He paused, another deep intake of breath signalling his nervousness of what was coming next.

****

“The second… was to destroy Skywalker Security, destroy my uncle’s company, his work, his contracts. I razed it to the ground, no prisoners, no quarter. I ruined his reputation and his standing in the industry, causing him to disappear without a trace.”

****

Rey was afraid to ask, but she had to.

****

“And your mother?” 

****

“My mother didn’t understand, she couldn’t  _ see _ . So when I walked away from the ashes of Skywalker Security, I walked away from her, too.” 

****

Despite her intentions, Rey found herself shrinking away from his embrace. She had always had the sense that the First Order was a corporate shark, and that Ben had done things that she would view as a morally and ethically repugnant. But to hear it spoken so plainly, and to know that it was  _ family _ he had annihilated to get where he was now - that left her cold. 

****

As was typical in her relationship with Ben, Rey was torn. She had always lived her life by principles, by a code, and if that meant that opportunities were missed, then she told herself they weren’t the opportunities worth having. So her life was simple, her circle small, and she always did what she thought was right for a higher purpose, not just for herself.

****

But being with Ben, she reminded herself, was utterly selfish. She basked in the affection he lavished on her, and was captivated by the way he saw right into her - for not just who she was, but who she could be. She felt like a big, shining star in his orbit, full of potential and power. 

****

She had spent the past weeks held tight in Ben’s arms, telling herself it was alright as long as the professional and ethical lines weren’t crossed. That if she brokered the right and just deal, and lived by it, that she could have Ben and her principles would still stay intact. 

****

Now, she wondered if that had all been built on the dark, murky foundation that was Ben, his past, his future and what he was willing to do to get what he wanted. That it was the  _ having _ that was his driving force, not the  _ giving _ that she herself lived by.

****

He seemed uneasy with her silence, his eyes desperately searching her face for her reaction.

****

“Rey?  _ Mon rayon de soleil _ ?”

****

Rey did what she always did when she was confronted with something she couldn’t quite rationalise into right or wrong, that she couldn’t align with her principles - she pushed it to the side, and pretended that everything was just fine. 

“Wow,” she said with a brightness that didn’t meet her eyes. “That’s quite an eventful beginning! Mine is boring in comparison - girl becomes an orphan, puts herself through school and college while working a couple of jobs for not a lot of money, starts her career with a series of dead-end jobs, finally gets the courage to apply for a job with Holdo Security.” She gave a hollow laugh. “Nothing as exciting and dangerous as your life.”

****

That Rey’s life hadn’t been exciting  _ or _ dangerous until she met Ben, remained unspoken between them.

****

She shuffled out from his embrace to stand upright next to the bed.

****

“I’m starving! I’ll go get breakfast,” she said, desperate to get some space between her heart and her fear.

****

As she turned to head to the kitchen, Ben suddenly dove for her arm to stop her from leaving.

****

His eyes were wide with trepidation and it was clear from the look on his face, and the way he chewed his bottom lip, that the reaction he had gotten from Rey was not the one he was looking for.

****

“I know I hurt people, and I know what I did  _ some _ people might think was wrong,” he said in a low voice, heavy with the need for understanding.

****

The snort of derision that escaped her took them both by surprise.

****

He pressed on, his grip on her arm becoming tighter.

****

“But know that I would never,  _ ever, _ harm you. You mean the world to me, and if I hurt you I just couldn’t live with myself.” 

****

He took a deep breath, as if to bolster himself for what he was about to say.

****

_ “I love you _ , Rey.”

****

Time stood still at that moment, and it felt as if the air had been sucked from her chest. Her arm hung limply in his firm grasp as she stared blankly at him. 

****

She had longed to hear those words during the time they had been together, since the time she had realised that she loved Ben, too. Her love for him burned within her, and at this very moment she was at a loss as to what to do with it, what it meant for her future and all the other dreams she had for herself that existing beyond being Ben’s lover.

****

Even after this particular contract was awarded, there would always be another, and another. She wanted to stay with Holdo Security, where she had friends. Where she had purpose. How could she stay but live in constant fear of discovery?

****

Ben tugged on her arm gently to bring her back to him.

****

“Rey?”

****

But she wouldn’t ever not drown in his eyes, or not melt at his touch. It was beyond her.

****

“I love you, too.” She said softly.

****

In her fantasies, this was the most perfect moment of her life. When Ben Solo proclaimed his love for her, and she confessed her love for him. But in reality, it didn’t feel like that at all.

****

Instead, after he revealed what lengths he was willing to go to, to get what he wanted, her love felt heavy, like a weight. Like a choice between having him and keeping her principles. 

****

It was a choice with a bitter aftertaste no matter which path she chose.

****

Ben seemed to be bound by the same disappointment, like the moment had not gone as he had hoped it would, either.

****

He tugged on her arm again, trying to pull her back to him.

****

“Come back to bed,” he said. She could sense his need for her to join him, so they could make the other feel good and forget what had just passed between them.

****

But she couldn’t. Not yet.

****

She pulled her arm away, and this time he let her go.

****

She smiled to lessen the sting. “I’m so hungry, though! Let me make some breakfast - waffles, with ice cream!” She forced a giggle at the ridiculousness of having such an unhealthy start to the day and hastily beat a retreat to the safety of the kitchen.

****

———-

****

Rey was still trying to recover from her conversation when Amy stuck her head around her office door, later that morning.

****

“I’m taking you out to lunch.” Amy said with a wink.

****

Rey knew that wink usually spelt more drama and intrigue that her heart could take, but she couldn't very well say no.

****

“Sounds great!” She responded brightly.

****

“Be ready in five,” Amy replied. “‘And bring your notepad.”

_______

****

The ride to the restaurant was quiet, just the hum of the engine and the muffled sounds of road noise to cut through the silence.

****

They were headed to a part of town that Rey wasn’t familiar with. Usually business lunches were held in the restaurants close to the business complex the Holdo Security offices were located in.

****

The part of town they were headed to was not the equivalent of off-Broadway. It was the equivalent of off-off- _ off _ Broadway.

****

Why was Holdo taking her to lunch so far away from the office?

****

Rey’s nerves began to play with her mind. 

****

Was Amy gearing up for a confrontation? 

****

Did Amy want to fire her, and wanted an out of the way, neutral location to do it?

****

Did Amy know about her and Ben?

****

Was Amy going to leave her on the outskirts of home with a compass, ten dollars and a map for her to find her way back to the office in some twisted team building exercise?

****

And why in the fuck did she need her  _ notepad _ ?

****

Rey did not feel at all comfortable with any of the events that were unfolding before her.

______

****

The scene that greeted her was anticlimactic to say the least.

****

A small, out of the way diner that had long forgotten the days of the lunch rush, a decor that belonged to another era, and an ambience that screamed get in and get the hell out as fast as you can.

****

It was an odd choice from Amy, who Rey  _ knew _ liked the finer things.

****

The diner was almost completely empty, save for an older, bearded man sitting at a booth tucked in an out of the way corner of the restaurant. 

****

To Rey’s surprise, the man stood when she and Amy entered and waved them over as if to join him.

****

To which Amy responded by accepting his offer, but not first without greeting him like he was an old friend. The warmth that spread across Amy’s face was an unfamiliar sight to Rey, it almost made Amy seem… human.

****

“You old bugger, the years have not been kind to you.” Amy ribbed.

****

“I wish could say the same to  _ you _ , Ames. You look the same as when you and I worked together way back when,” he shot back.

****

Amy  _ blushed _ , and gave the man a playful nudge with her elbow.

****

“Luke, since when did you get so smooth? Anyone would think you were taking lessons from Han Solo.” she clearly was pleased with the compliment.

****

Rey blinked at the mention of Ben’s surname, immediately confused by the connection to Amy and her old friend.

****

The pair suddenly broke off from their banter, and turned to Rey in unison.

****

“Rey, I would like you to meet Luke. Luke, this is the woman you’ve heard so much about.”

The man named Luke stuck out his hand, to which Rey responded by gripping it in an appropriately confident, yet non-aggressive manner.

****

“Pleased to meet you Rey, I’m Luke,” his handshake was warm and oddly familiar. “Luke Skywalker.”

****

Rey gasped in shock as she realised that she was shaking the hand of Luke Skywalker. Of the former Skywalker Security. 

****

Ben’s uncle.

****

_ Fucking hell……. _

****

It look every ounce of composure for her to keep shaking the hand of the man Ben Solo had confessed to ruining financially and reputationally, only just that morning.

****

“Pleased to meet you,” she forced a thin smile to match his genuine one. 

****

“Sit, sit. Let’s eat,” he gestured, inviting them to sit at the booth with him and catching the eye of the waitress to place their order.

****

Rey sat in dumb silence as the two spoke of old times and memories, nodding at the appropriate times, forcing laughter along with them as they remembered tight spots and scrapes.

****

All the while, sitting in abject terror, the cold hand of fear around her heart and gripping her throat. 

****

_ Luke Skywalker.  _

****

_ Ben’s Uncle. _

****

_ Luke Skywalker, Ben’s uncle - that Ben decimated when Luke wouldn’t do as he wanted.  _

****

As they ran out of shared memories, their talk turned to business - which was evidently the purpose of the meeting that day.

****

“So Luke, tell Rey about your company,” said Amy.

****

Rey was confused - she thought Skywalker Security was long gone - a result of the misdeeds of one Mr. Ben Solo.

****

“Thank you, Amy. Have you heard of Green Light Security?” he inquired.

****

“Y..yes, I’ve seen the name - but that’s it,” she stammered. She had tried doing a background search on them at the beginning of her time at Holdo Security, but came up with nothing. In a blinding flash, she also recalled the name had been listed on the briefing session several weeks earlier. The day she opened her window, only to have Ben Solo crash through it.

****

_ Green Light Security was Holdo’s little bird? _

****

But surely if Luke Skywalker was at the meeting, Ben Solo would have noticed… there must have been a different representative there that day, she determined.

****

“I would be surprised if you knew anything more than that. For the last few years, Green Light has been operating in the shadows. Building a “behind closed doors” reputation for handling the most sensitive assignments this government has.”

****

Amy nodded emphatically in agreement.

****

“It’s taken years to rebuild his reputation and standing -  _ years _ .” Amy ventured.

****

Rey was in love with the very  _ reason _ why Luke’s reputation had to be rebuilt in the first place.

Amy continued on. “So, Green Light and Holdo Security are going to merge to form a new company - Light Side Security. Separately, we are an easy target for First Order. But together,  _ together _ , we are an unbeatable force that will end the domination of the First Order on our industry.”

****

Amy reached out to grab Rey’s hand. “This is how we could win. This is how we defeat the First Order.” Her eyes gleamed with excitement, and it took every cell in Rey’s body to look excited, while her heart sank to the floor.

****

“So, you’ll be working closely with Luke over the next few weeks, and we’ll set you up in his office across town. He will teach you everything he knows, it’s going to be fantastic for your development, Rey. There might even be a promotion in it for you. After we win!” 

****

Amy squeezed her hand and laughed.

****

“Oh Rey, you look like you have seen a ghost! Don’t be scared of Luke Skywalker, he’s an old grump - but he doesn’t bite.”

****

“Get out your notepad, Rey, it’s time to do some planning,” Amy instructed. 

****

Today should have been the best day of her life. A profession of love from Ben Solo, and the potential for career advancement. Instead she felt absolutely torn in half, and was in danger of losing everything that mattered to her.

****

She loved Ben Solo, and knew he would be devastated that she was helping the man he held so much resentment against. But she had to hide it from him, she  _ had _ to. Her honour, loyalty and principles demanded it. 

****

She would not sell out Holdo Security. 

****

But when the time came for Ben to find out - and he would - she doubted her honour, loyalty and principles would be enough to keep him.

****  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally, all of Amy's strange behaviour is explained (sorry Love of Escapism - she wasn't fucking Hux)
> 
> I would love to know what people thought about the big reveal - and what it means for Rey.
> 
> Comments and kudos give me creative energy, so feel free to leave one or both.


	7. Private Eyes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Poor Rey had the shock of her life when Amy Holdo’s big plans were finally revealed. Which means now she is keeping a big secret from Ben - and one that could tear them apart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Get ready for the pain train people - but I sincerely promise the HEA is coming.
> 
> Thank you always to my most wonderful betas [MyJediLife](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MyJediLife) and and [TazWren](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TazWren).
> 
> [LoveofEscapism](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LoveofEscapism), I hope you enjoy this next instalment.

Rey had been distant from him for a couple of weeks. She was working somewhere else, not at her office but some other location. Not that he knew where, because she wouldn't tell him.

****

Ben could feel it - that she was slipping away from him.

****

He had never told anyone that he had loved them before, not even his parents - and while she had repeated the words back to him, hers were tinged with sadness as much as his were consumed by desperation.

****

It was not how he had seen things unfolding at all.

****

_ She told me that her feelings wouldn’t change, no matter what I had done. I mean - I’m Ben Solo - I told her I loved her - why isn’t that enough for her? What is the problem?  _

****

That Ben seemed - in actual fact - to  _ be _ Rey’s problem was far too disconcerting for him to contemplate.

****

It didn’t make any sense because she, of all people, should understand what it was like to fight for your place at the table. To fight for power, to claim what you were owed.

****

Rey grew up without a family, without the pressure of expectation and the ghosts of the past dictating your future.

****

She had been free of expectation, free to make any choice she wanted. Unlike him.

****

The contracts on his desk were weighty with detail, detail he wasn’t in the mood to interrogate. Ben picked up his grandfather's fountain pen and flipped to the “sign here tabs” to insert his signature.

****

Usually the ritual of signing a new deal with his grandfather’s pen was a spiritual one. The feeling of continuing his grandfather's legacy - but with the First Order.

****

This time it felt empty. He stroked the filigree of the pen, and as usual he admired its beauty and its history. It was the pen his grandfather would use to seal a deal, too.

****

This pen had seen history, and secured contracts for operations that were of a dark nature - a nature that regular civilians just could not understand. The world was not utopian; in order to protect what was yours, it sometimes meant you had to take from someone else.

****

It was just the way things were. Rey needed to see that. She needed to understand. For her own protection, as much as for his benefit.

****

Hux was pissed, to say the least. The bid for the new contract they were working on had a deadline of only a little over a week away. Usually, when one week out from a bid, Ben Solo would have been camped out at First Order headquarters. Running the numbers, fine tuning the offer, terrorising the staff and pushing them harder and harder until they would break (which they sometimes did).

This time; however, he was distracted. Consumed with thoughts of a beautiful woman with chestnut hair and hazel eyes flecked with gold, and a smile that lit up his world. 

****

A woman who disapproved of his business tactics entirely.

****

Ben decided there was only one thing to do. He had to get Rey to come to his office and see that things were better at First Order Security. That Holdo had nothing to offer her. That power and prestige had purpose and meaning, and were noble goals too.

****

He dialed her number, and was very relieved when she answered it.

****

“Hello.” she said cooly. They never mentioned names or spoke to each other like lovers when they were in earshot of another person.

****

“Rey, can I see you tonight?” He asked.

****

“I’m really flat out - and you should be too, if my calculations are correct.” Her tone remained neutral.

****

It killed Ben that he didn’t know if it was because she was trying not to give the game away about who she was talking to - or that she actually  _ felt _ neutral about him.

****

“Please Rey, I need to see you. There is something really important you need to see.”

****

“Really?” She sounded tired, as if she was wearing down, like he was swinging her around what he wanted her to do. 

****

“Come to my office. I will meet you at the basement like usual and then bring you up.”

****

“Ben!” she exclaimed, then quickly regained her composure before growling, “I’m not coming to your office.”

****

“Please, just trust me.  _ I love you, _ ” he crooned. He meant what he said, he did love her, and he truly felt she should trust him. But he also knew that those words would make her putty in his hands.

****

The heavy sigh at the end of the line told him the battle was won.

****

“Fine. I’ll be there at eight.” she relented, and then promptly ended the call.

****

Satisfied that his plans were coming to fruition, he stalked out of his office to glare at Mitaka, his personal assistant. 

****

“Tell everyone I want them cleared out by 5pm sharp. If I see one person still on this floor at 5.01pm, I will have their heads,  _ and _ their jobs, for it.”

****

Mitaka swallowed anxiously, his only response was to nod in compliance. 

****

——

****

At 8.10 pm, Rey walked into Ben’s office with her arms folded across her chest. She looked tired, he thought. Like she was missing sleep and working too hard. He could fix that for her.

****

It had taken a great deal of persuading and cajoling in the basement to get her up into his office. He can’t say that his tactics were entirely fair, but he knew she had a weak spot for soft kisses and nuzzles to her ear.

****

He grabbed her hand to lead her to his desk.

****

“See, this is the pen I was telling you about. All I have left of my family legacy.”

****

He picked up the pen to press it into her hand.

****

“See, it has two ends - like two halves joined together. Each with their own purpose and power, but bonded together.”

****

_ Like you and me _ , he wanted to say.

****

“It’s the pen my grandfather used when he was conducting business. It has history, it has  _ made _ history.”

****

“It’s very beautiful,” she agreed. He noticed that he eyes kept wandering to his window - that at that moment had the blinds shut.

****

He wanted her attention back to the pen, back to the reason she was there in the first place.

****

He placed it back in its holder.

****

“Look at how it is suspended inside the two dragons inside the circle -  _ the circle of life, _ Rey.”

****

He was desperately trying to reach her, to show her what was important to him. But she just kept looking at the window.

****

Changing tactics, he pressed the pen back into her hand, and led her to the window. He opened the blinds so she could see into her office, but was disappointed when only closed blinds were revealed to her. 

****

Of course, she hadn’t been there for a couple of weeks. There was no reason for them to be open.

****

He saw how she softened, and he knew she was remembering the first night they had shared together - and what they had shared against her window. He slid his arms around her for comfort.

****

They were bonded together in the moment, and he felt her yield a little in his arms. Relief flooded his senses, and he felt the knot that had set up residence in his stomach for the past two weeks begin to dissolve.

****

He rested his chin on the top of her head, enjoying the warmth of her back against his chest.

****

The moment was broken by the trill of his phone. Instinct told him to let it go to his message service, but one week out from the tender deadline, he was compelled by force of habit to answer. Doubly so when he recognised the number as being that of his private investigator’s office.

****

Ben was confident he could take the call in front of Rey, that whatever was discussed he would be able to speak about obtusely enough so he didn’t have to break their embrace.

****

“Mr. Solo?” Came the voice down the other end of the line. “There have been some developments with my investigation into Green Light Security that I think you will find interesting.”

****

“Go on,” he replied sharply. He was mesmerised by the sight of Rey’s delicate hands as she started to stroke and caress the pen. He wasn’t sure whether his grandfather would have either approved of, or have been outraged by, the filthy thoughts Ben was beginning to have again about those hands stroking and caressing  _ him _ .

****

It had been well over a week since he’d had her, and his cock twitched at the thought of ruining her on  _ his _ desk and at  _ his _ window. He decided it was appropriate to execute a little multitasking.

****

Ben felt Rey shiver as he allowed his free hand to rest on the curve of her hip, his thumb lightly stroking her in the way he knew made her melt.

****

The thrill that tore through him as she pressed back against his pelvis with a soft moan was almost unbearable. It felt as if all the blood in his body rushed straight to his cock, and he was immediately harder than he had ever been in living memory.

****

Rey giggled softly as she rubbed up against his erection, which turned in a soft groan as Ben moved his hand to cup between her legs.

****

“I’ve missed you,” she whispered.

****

Ben nuzzled the crook of her neck, pulling the phone away from his ear to whisper back, “I missed you too,  _ mon rayon de soleil.” _

****

The hiss she gave as he pressed his hand harder against her caused his cock to jerk inside his pants.

****

He was going to fuck her at his window, and it was going to be glorious.

****

He just needed to finish this call.

****

“Mr. Solo, I have determined who is behind Green Light Security, and who they are working with in this bid.”

****

“Out with it,” he growled through gritted teeth, he wanted this conversation over with - so he could get on with the business of having Rey come while his cock was inside her.

He started moving his hands in a small, circular motion, applying equally firm pressure across her clit and her folds. Her moans and writhing were becoming more pronounced now. She was melting underneath his attentions, her hand reaching up to grip his arm while still holding the pen.

****

“I’m getting to that,” came the brisk reply. “I’m just about to send across the surveillance photos.”

****

Ben’s phone reacted with several short dings, indicating the photos had been sent.

****

“I can confirm that Green Light Security is planning to merge with Holdo Security Services.”

****

Ben immediately froze. Was that what Rey had been up to for the past few weeks? Orchestrating a tactical ploy to outplay him and the First Order? He could feel the burn of humiliation at being out manoeuvred. 

****

Jealousy was not far behind, and he began to wonder just  _ who _ she had been working so closely with, and who had taken her away from him.

****

His erection immediately subsided, and he removed his hand from between her legs - and took a step back to break their embrace.

****

Clearly confused by his sudden withdrawal, Rey quickly spun around to look at him, bewilderment and hurt plastered across her face.

****

“ _ Ben _ ?” She whispered, reaching out to cup his face to entreat him to look at her.

****

But he shook her hand away, unable to meet her gaze.

****

The investigator continued.

****

“I can also reveal that Luke Skywalker, your uncle, is the owner of Green Light. Take a look at the photos I just sent you as evidence.”

****

Fear, rage, jealousy and betrayal consumed him. The same fire he had felt the day he decided his uncle was dead to him, and that he would burn Skywalker Security to the ground.

****

“That will be all.” he said to his investigator, abruptly ending the call so he could see the photos sent to him.

****

It was worse than he could have imagined. Photo after photo of Luke and Rey together. Lunch at a diner with Holdo. Coffee - just the two of them.

****

In the diner photos he noticed she looked pensive, upset. But in other photos she seemed happy, smiling, laughing.  _ Enjoying _ his company.

****

His rage was an all consuming fire, but his voice was as cold as ice.

****

“Luke, Rey? Your secret is  _ Luke _ ?”

****

She turned pale at his words, but at the same time she stood a little taller, as if she was squaring for a battle.

****

“Ben, you need to understand, I  _ couldn’t _ tell you. I wanted to, but it was impossible.” 

****

Ben was confused. She’d betrayed him, and yet she wasn’t falling to her knees to beg for his forgiveness. She was standing her ground like she was  _ right _ .

****

He was about to fire back at her, when there was a sudden thumping commotion at the door. 

****

“Solo, open this fucking door  _ now _ !”

****

It was Hux, and while Ben was immediately relieved he had locked the door as a precaution, it didn’t fix the problem that the enemy was in there with him. 

****

He turned to Rey, but she was already scrambling around to the other side of his desk to hide.

****

“Solo!” Hux had never sounded so enraged before - and the man was constantly in a state of fury.

****

Confident that Rey was hidden from sight, he strode over, unlocking the door and flinging it open, ready to face whatever venom Hux wanted to throw at him.

****

“ _ What. Do. You. Want _ ?” Ben growled through gritted teeth.

****

“Have you heard about this? Did you know? And where the fuck is everyone?” Hux spat.

****

“Did I hear what? And I sent them home.”

****

“Holdo Security and Green Light are merging - we have to stop them!  _ Your uncle _ owns Green Light, and is at the centre of this - and now you’re going to fix it!”

****

“What would you suggest I do, Hux? Write a letter politely asking them not to merge?”

****

“Oh, you will do much better than that,  _ Solo. _ We have a meeting with the government in four days time. A meeting where you will produce the evidence that Holdo and Green Light have been spying on the First Order, and request that they should be struck from contention for the security services contract immediately!  _ We will destroy them both in one swift stroke. _ ”

****

“Hux, you goddamn idiot, I don’t  _ have _ any evidence. I just said what I said to fuck with someone.” Ben was fuming, and he knew his words would hurt Rey, but at that moment  - filled with rage - he just didn’t care. He hoped they stung her, just as her betrayal had broken him.

****

“Solo, you pathetic excuse for a General Manager,  _ fucking make some evidence up _ . Do your job! Or do you need to be replaced by someone… competent?” 

****

Ben knew that Hux was just trying to antagonise him even further - and it was working.

****

“Fine, it would be  _ my pleasure _ to destroy them both. I know what to do,” he spat.

****

“See that you do, Solo. I’m tired of cleaning up  _ your _ messes.” With that parting shot, Hux turned on his heel and walked away.

****

Ben slammed the door, locking it as he did; he could hear her moving out from under the desk. He knew there was about to be a confrontation and did not want any further interruptions.

****

As he turned to face her, he saw her face contorted in furious disbelief. It reminded him of that first confrontation they had all those weeks ago, when they both hurled accusations at the other. Except this time it was different, the fire in her eyes burned much deeper. She felt it more, and she was stronger for it.

****

“Ben Solo, you are the worst thing that has ever happened to me.”

****

Her words cut through him like a knife. The time he had spent with her, as he was falling in love with her, for him it had been the best days of his life. Where he felt happy and free. Where he had been complete as long as he was with her. But she felt the opposite?

****

“You do this, you break your word to me - to us - and lie to the government about Holdo and Green Light, I will never forgive you.  _ Ever _ .”

****

This time her words were like a punch to his chest - the words  _ “to us _ ” reverberated through him. 

****

_ Us _ .

****

There was an “ _ us. _ ”

****

Except now, there didn’t seem like there would be much of an “us” left, after they were finished with each other.

****

He felt his mind whirling out of control, his grip on reality was slipping away and panic and paranoia were taking over. 

****

“ _ You betrayed me!”  _ He bellowed, “You are working with my uncle.  _ My uncle _ \- who ruined my legacy, my birthright! He took what was mine! I saw the pictures Rey, I saw you and him laughing. About stupid Ben Solo, no doubt, falling in love with the enemy and being led around by the cock, the whole time you were destroying everything I had worked so hard for.” 

****

Her nostrils flared, and her eyes narrowed in derision at his words. Words that should have had her sobbing and wailing for mercy, to be allowed back into his arms and his bed. But she was having none of it. 

****

“I didn’t  _ betray  _ you, you self-centred, immoral, feckless idiot! How could I tell you without compromising my work? Why would you want me to do that? How can you say that you love me, when my integrity is everything to me and yet you resent it so much. You don’t really love me, Ben. You love money, and power, and prestige and… fucking. But you don’t love me. You don’t know how to.”

****

He was crushed by her words, and doubt over the strength of his convictions was beginning to creep in. What if what she said was true? What if she had been right not to tell him about working with his uncle? If it were him, what would he have done? 

****

It began to sink that he probably wouldn't have said anything, either. He would have held to the deal that they shook on, and gone on doing what was best for the First Order. 

****

_ Shit, what am I doing? _

****

_ Fuck….. -  what have I done? _

****

But Rey was about to deal the final blow.

****

”We  _ have  _ been talking about you. About that you are correct. Luke has been telling me about Skywalker Security - and about you. He told me that he regrets how he acted towards you when you first came to the company, that you weren’t a bad kid, and that he had forgiven you for what you did. My only regret is that I will never be able to tell Luke that he was wrong. That you grew up to be an evil, soulless son of a bitch who I am sorry to have met, and to have shared a bed with.”

****

“We are a  _ mistake _ , pure and simple.” she flung at him, knowing it would be like a dagger to his heart.

****

To have his affirmation of their relationship thrown back in his face was brutal. To be told that he was an evil, soulless, son of a bitch was devastating. To hear that Luke forgave him was completely, totally and utterly  _ repugnant _ . Rey pulled no punches when she was angry and hurt.

****

“Now get me out of here, before I let Hux know exactly what we have been up to.”

****

He had the feeling she meant it, that she was capable of anything right now. That’s how angry and disgusted she was with him.

****

Getting her out of the office was simple enough, he was well practiced in such things when it came to sneaking women in and out of his office.

****

Watching her go was the hardest and most painful thing he had ever experienced, especially when she didn't look back.

****

Not once.

****

He headed up to his office, which was filled with regret, betrayal and despair. He saw the crystal inkwell that cradled his grandfather’s pen. But the pen wasn’t there. She had taken it with her, still clutched in her hand.

****

Neither of them had noticed it in the heat of the moment.

****

He picked up the inkwell, feeling the weight of it in his hands. The smoothness of the crystal under his fingertips, and the texture of the metal holder in his hands as he stroked it.

****

Ben had told Rey that the pen was all that was left of the legacy of his grandfather. About how much it meant to him. It was the only thing he took with him the day he left Skywalker Security - and it was the only thing in his office that was personal. 

****

Or important.

****

But right at this moment, it didn’t feel personal or important at all. What had  _ really _ been important had just walked away from him, disgusted and disappointed at who he had turned out to be.

****

Regretting that she had ever met him.

****

Or slept with him. When it had been a mind altering, life changing experience for him.

****

The anger he had earlier directed at Rey came back on himself at full force. He felt the shame, bitterness and self-loathing that comes when a person recognizes that they have behaved without morals, integrity or principles - and that not only did it mean that they didn’t get what they wanted, they had lost what they needed instead.

****

Unable to contain his rage and hurt, he threw the inkwell in his hand straight at his window, where it smashed into a thousand pieces, raining its shards around him. The blue ink oozed down the glass, like blood below the large crack that had formed on impact. 

****

He watched as the ink slowly pooled onto the carpet. He wasn’t concerned about the window, and strangely, he didn’t regret destroying what was once so important to him, something which had held so much value. It occurred to him that these were just things, material items that were replaceable and interchangeable. Unlike people. 

****

It was an unexpected reaction for him - to say the least.

****

Feeling oddly calmer for the outburst, he brushed the broken pieces of glass from his desk and chair and took a seat, logging onto the First Order computer server. He stared at the folders and file paths, his head tilted to one side in deep contemplation.

****

So much power and influence at his disposal. He knew what he needed to do, but he wasn’t sure if he was strong enough to do it.

****

Was it enough? Was  _ he _ enough?

****

Pushing his hands through his hair and worrying his bottom lip, a plan of action began to form in his mind. He could see the path clearly now, and Hux was right - evidence, for the meeting to be held in four days time, was absolutely needed.

****

He took in a deep breath, and resolutely set about putting his plan into action.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who has shared with me how much the have enjoyed this fic. It is very dear to me, and I'm very proud of how it has come along.
> 
> Comments and kudos make my day, so feel free to leave one or both.


	8. You are my sunshine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the disaster that was the last chapter, Ben and Rey must face the truth about themselves and each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, the last chapter was probably the most intense thing I have ever written.
> 
> So if you came back after that - thank you.
> 
> As always thank you to my betas, MyJediLife and TazWren.
> 
> HEA is on the way LoveofEscapism!

Rey was grateful that her work could distract her. 

****

It was her work that had put her in the path of Ben Solo, brought them together, and then torn them apart; the irony was not lost on her.

****

She loved him, she missed him, and her heart ached. 

****

Her recollection of the chain of events, the night everything went to hell, was hazy at best. But she remembered the feelings - fear, confusion, desire, bewilderment, betrayal and anger--because they still burned within her. Like the piece of her that felt complete while being with Ben had been ripped out - and had taken more of her along with it.

****

She remembered reconnecting with him for the briefest of moments, as she stood gazing out across to her office from his window. His hands were on her, doing only the things his hands could do. Then, he took that phone call and the next minute, Ben was accusing her of betraying him.

****

When they had an agreement. An agreement that she was honouring - even though it had pained her. She  _ knew _ she’d been trying to put distance between Ben and herself from the moment she met Luke and they began working together. But she just didn’t know what else to do. She’d been so afraid she would accidentally reveal something to Ben, an offhand comment or statement that would have raised his suspicion.

****

When she realised she had taken his grandfather’s pen with her, she had felt sick to her stomach. So, she had mailed it to his apartment - after all, she could not very well just stride up to First Order Security Reception and drop it off. Every single part of her wanted to mail it back to him in little pieces. To let him know what she thought of his precious pen, and his precious legacy.

****

But she knew it was important to him - so even though he had hurt her so badly - she sent it back to him intact. She even put it in a box lined with protective packaging so it would make the journey safely.

****

She wondered how Ben was doing.

****

_ I’m sure he’s doing just fine _ , she reminded herself firmly. She refused to even glance at her window, the blinds of which had remained completely shut.

****

_ Permanently _ , she told herself. There was nothing he could do to make what he had done right.

****

_ My job, my desk, my office. Fuck you, window. _

****

For the most part, when they’d been together and couldn’t talk about their day at work specifically, she and Ben had fallen into step with each other, and could sense when the other had had a bad day. Providing comfort to the other because they understood each other - words were not needed. It was just them together, against the world. Until it was them against each other.

****

So, in the weeks following their catastrophic argument, the gaping wound in her heart went unsoothed, and the intensity of her work demands increased.

****

The day Ben was due to bring her world down around her - with the false evidence that would destroy Lightside Security--passed uneventfully. Which was remarkable really, considering the treachery that he and Hux had planned. The intensity, fear and panic of those few days had fallen to a dull roar, and then to an ever present throbbing ache. Yet, she still waited in nervous anticipation of the death knell.

****

Because the truth would definitely come out, and in any case, she felt the need to come clean. She knew she had compromised everything Lightside Security had worked for, and they deserved to know.

****

But she wasn’t ready just yet - with Ben out of her life, her work and her work friends were all that she had left. Indeed, Amy was particularly happy with Rey - and it was an approval that was hard fought and hard won - even though she felt undeserving of it.

****

The post-project party was perhaps the most uncomfortable of all.

****

Amy and Luke took the team out to dinner to celebrate the tender being submitted. When the time came for speeches, both business owners were particularly glowing towards Rey’s performance.

****

Amy raised her glass in preparation for a toast, her arm a little wobbly from the alcohol she had already imbibed.

****

“It was only three short months ago that Rey started with the company. In that short time, she has confirmed - and exceeded - every single expectation I had of her.”

****

Her friends and colleagues all nodded in agreement.

****

These were the words that Rey had longed to hear since the day she started at Holdo Security, but they left her consumed with guilt. Guilt over her pursuit of love with Ben Solo, how it had ended so badly, and the way the risk had in  _ no way _ been worth it.

****

Not one bit.

****

Amy continued, “I know that I asked a lot of you, Rey - that the company asked a lot from you. Especially asking you to work so closely with this cantankerous old coot,” she said, playfully giving Luke a nudge with her elbow.

****

The table erupted in laughter, including Luke, his eyes crinkling at the sides as he chortled at Amy’s good natured ribbing.

****

“But through it all, you have remained strong and on task… save for a couple of missteps at the beginning,” she said kindly.

****

Rey kept her smile planted on her face, but cringed inside, as she knew Amy was referring to that briefing session where things had taken a turn full pelt towards Ben Solo.

****

“So, Rey, indeed you turned out to be my secret weapon. That spark I saw in you the day you came in for an interview has turned into a raging fire. You are a talent, and we want to keep that talent close to us. If you will have us, I would like to take you on staff permanently.”

****

It was then the table really erupted into clapping and cheering - happy for Rey’s success, and that she would be staying on.

****

The tear that slid down Rey’s cheek could easily be mistaken for overwhelming joy and happiness. But really, it was for everything she had lost, and would lose, once the truth came out.

****

Amy seemed to take Rey’s silence as acceptance of her offer.

****

———-

****

Her bond with Luke had been a surprise. Part of it, she thought, was because of his connection to Ben.

****

The other was that he just seemed to… accept her for who she was. He didn’t ask anything of her, make demands or threats. Instead, he encouraged, boosted and believed in her. There was no angst, nor games nor sabotage. Just a couple of people working on a project together - and while she couldn’t share anything with him about Ben, or her hurt, Luke’s company made it a little easier all the same.

****

“Rey, you are going to go on to great things out there one day. I can feel it,” he told her one day.

****

She was confused, why did Luke think she was going to leave? Did he know something she didn’t?

****

“Rey, Holdo and I -  we are what you will grow beyond. One day I can see you out there, making your way, setting your own path. Once, I worked with someone who was just like you… perhaps not quite so much your sunny disposition - but that same intelligence, grit and determination.”

****

She knew he was talking about Ben, and what had happened at Skywalker Security.

****

“But I failed him, I failed to listen and to accept him for who he was. I wanted to cling to the old ways of doing things, believing I was on the right path. I had decided to play it safe - but in business playing it safe using means playing yourself right out of the game. Ben saw this, but I didn’t listen - I feared change, even though change was needed. So he rebelled, and came to me with that terrible,  _ terrible _ contract - and we all paid a terrible, terrible price. My sister, my brother in law, me -  but especially Ben. So now, when I see that raw talent like I see in you, I no longer try to control it, or fear it.”

****

Rey was unable to speak, on the one hand Luke’s belief in her gave her confidence that she was destined for other, bigger things, while at the same time stoking the longing for her current situation to be different. Ben’s relationship with Luke was the catalyst for Ben turning to the First Order - and everything else that went along with it.

****

She wished that Luke could have been with Ben the way he was with her. Perhaps then she and Ben would have met - not on the opposite ends of warring companies - but as colleagues, coworkers… and then lovers.

****

Together, they could have taken on the world.

_____

****

Now that the bid was in, it was time to play the waiting game.

****

These things always took time, Holdo warned. 

****

Rey was ever vigilant, and on the look out for Ben, now that she was no longer working off site with Luke. Of course, she was terrified of the day when Luke moved into the office, too. It was inevitable that Ben and Luke would cross paths, eventually. Or Luke and Hux.

****

But strangely, it never came to pass and the reason became clear later that week.

****

As usual, it all began with a meeting with Amy, and that look she got in her eye when some really juicy gossip had come her way.

****

“Rey, take a seat,” she invited. “Put your pen and pad away - I have some  _ very _ interesting news.”

****

Rey did as she was told, as always bracing for what was to come next. You never knew with Amy.

****

“So,” Amy said in a conspiratorial tone, “guess what I found out today.”

****

“What?” said Rey, who knew the game by now.

****

“I was talking to one of my contacts today, and it turns out - First Order Security  _ never put in a bid for the contract. _ ” Amy let the revelation hang in the air.

****

This time, the expression on Rey’s face was shock. Genuine, complete shock. How was that even possible - there was nothing that would stop the First Order, Hux and Ben from taking what they wanted. What could have happened to change that?

****

“I know!” Amy said, taking Rey’s shock as an indication to press on.

****

“Rumor has it, there was a secret meeting planned just before the deadline. Hux and Solo went in together - but left separately. Something went down in that meeting, Rey. I don’t know what, but it was big - and big enough to bring down First Order! The entire company is about to fold, if the rumors are true.”

****

Amy’s eyes were as wide as saucers at the juicy details she shared - while Rey’s were scrunched together in confusion. She knew what the purpose of that meeting had been - to ruin Holdo Security, Green Light Security… and  _ her _ . But that had not come to pass, but in turn had destroyed the company Ben worked for as well?

****

“Amy,” she stammered “I just remembered something - I need to go.”

****

“Well, sure Rey, of course.” Amy was a lot more relaxed these days, and not in the least suspecting.

****

Rey rushed back to her office and, unable to stop herself, pulled open the blind to look at Ben’s window. All she saw was a drawn blind framing a large crack running down the glass, dried blue ink underneath it. That crack had not been there the night she'd been in Ben’s office, she was sure of it. Yet, there was something familiar about it all the same,  though she couldn’t quite place it.

****

What had happened in that meeting, she wondered, and how could it result in the First Order's withdrawal from competing?

****

A new curiosity had begun to burn within her. She had to find out... but, how?

****

She picked up her phone and groaned in frustration. The night she had walked away from him was the night she also deleted his number - so she would never be tempted to fold and call him. At the time, it had been a very effective technique, but right now, it meant she couldn’t make contact with him in that way.

****

Her second way to contact him was also closed, if the rumor mill was correct, Ben no longer worked for First Order - and that was if First Order still existed.

****

Which left only one option - going to his home. Alone. 

****

The idea of it was a heady whirl of excitement, fear, longing, and a healthy dose of nausea. Would he even speak to her? Would he slam the door in her face? Or worse, would he look at her in that way of his - and she would just melt into his arms?

****

Her core throbbed at the idea of it.

****

_ Traitor _ , she said to herself.

****

But the drive to know, to understand, to make sense of it, was overwhelming.

****

Ben had once told her that she knew when to take a risk. Sure - that risk at the time had been him, and that had absolutely turned into a personal and - most likely - professional disaster.

****

So, was this one of those times? There was a gnawing feeling that perhaps Ben had done something _ good _ in that meeting. 

****

Rey couldn’t believe what she was about to do. 

__________

****

“Lady, you getting out of this cab or not?” 

****

The cab driver was getting impatient with her as she sat, trying to drum up the courage to open the door, get out of the cab, knock on Ben’s door, ask him “what the fuck?”, listen to his reply, and then get the hell out of there with her dignity, her heart, and her panties still intact.

****

Or at least two out of the three?

****

“Fine,” she huffed, getting out. The driver made no attempt to hide his quick get away with a screech of tires.

****

She missed Ben’s private car service, it was amazing how quickly you could acclimatise to things you didn’t even know existed.

****

Like mind blowing sex.

****

The thing Rey was most concerned about was that her body would betray her. She had weeks of pent up frustration after being apart from Ben, and he knew how to pluck her strings like she was a Stradivarius violin, and he was a virtuoso. That he had been able to convince her to come up to his office, or down to the basement and get into his car, and especially to claim her at the window of her office, was testament to the hold he had over her.

****

_ Find out the truth, then get the hell out of there. _

****

_ ——— _

****

Rey rapped her knuckles on the door briskly - as an attempt to set the tone with Ben that she was in charge.

****

When Ben opened the door, however, it was like the air had been sucked out of her. 

****

Shit, she still loved him. About that - nothing had changed. Despite knowing who he was, and what he was capable of.  

****

She was screwed.

****

_ No, I can do this. Dignity. Heart. Panties. _

****

He looked similarly struck at the sight of her.

****

“ _ Rey? _ ” he said, his voice wavering as if he wasn’t sure if she was real or an apparition.

****

“Hello Ben,” she stood a little taller, although she was, of course, no match for his height.

****

“Hello Rey,” he said softly. “What are you doing here?”

****

Ben looked at her intensely, like he was trying to read her mind as to why she had suddenly appeared after weeks of no contact.

****

She pushed aside the telltale flip in her chest.

****

“I need to ask you something. Then I need to go, and everything goes back to the way it was - and tell me the truth.”

****

“I never lied to you, Rey - and there is no way I’m going to start now,” he paused for a moment before speaking again. “The way it was?” Ben sounded hopeful, and the look on his face softened a little. 

****

“As in, radio silence,” she replied firmly.

****

“Okay Rey,” he said. She ignored the sadness in his eyes.

****

_ Fuck, this is going to be more challenging that I realised. Dignity. Heart. What was the other one? Oh yes - panties. Must not forget those. _

****

She pressed forward, seeking to get the conversation over and done with before her resolve broke entirely.

****

“What happened at the meeting? What happened with Hux? Why did First Order withdraw from the competition? Why did nothing happen to Holdo or Luke?”

****

Rey knew that technically she was breaking their agreement, asking him such commercially sensitive questions, but given they were no longer together she figured their contract wasn’t worth the handshake it was made on.

****

Ben nervously raked his fingers through his hair, and it was like a snake was uncoiling deep in her stomach. 

****

_ Fuck. _

****

“Rey, I will tell you everything you want to know, but I can’t do it out here. You need to come inside.”

****

“No,” she replied. “No way, no how. Every time I agree to something like that I regret it.”

****

“Rey, you have made your position crystal clear. I won’t try anything, I swear. If you don’t want to come in, I understand - you are free to go, radio silence is back in play. But I can’t have a discussion with you out here. It could compromise the case.”

****

Rey screwed her face in confusion. Case? What case?

****

_ Shit, no way I can walk away from this now. _

****

“Fine,” she grunted. “But no sweet talk or telling me you love me - or any of that bullshit - okay?”

****

“Rey, it's not bull…” he reconsidered what he was going to say. “No sweet talk, no bullshit.” he agreed.

****

Rey pushed past him into the foyer of his apartment. There was no room where there wasn’t a moment of intimacy shared between them, and the longing for what they had here overwhelmed her. It was the only place where they had been safe together, and the only place where they had known each other.

****

_ Not that I ever really knew him _ , she reminded herself.

****

Ben closed the door behind him, but stood to the side, as if to show her that he wouldn’t stop her if she wanted to leave. It helped her feel a little more at ease. Her handbag held across her body also did the same.

****

He raked his hand through his hair again, and began to talk.

****

“Everything I am about to tell you is the truth. All of it. If I could ask that you just let me finish, and then I will answer anything else you want to know.”

****

Rey nodded in agreement.

****

“After you…. Left that night, I went back to my desk. I thought about what you had said, and it hurt me - deeply.” Rey bristled at his words, but Ben held up his hand to stop her from responding.

****

He continued. “The meeting went ahead - as scheduled. But it didn’t go as Hux had planned. Instead of bringing false evidence to incriminate Holdo and Luke…. I brought real evidence that implicated First Order Security in embezzlement and fraud.”

****

Rey’s jaw dropped in complete shock. It was far worse than she imagined, embezzlement… fraud.. It was so... dishonest. It made her feel ill. At the same time, the realization of what Ben had chosen to do dawned on her. When it came down to it, he hadn’t betrayed her. Even after their terrible argument, even after they were finished - he had chosen not to go through with what Hux wanted him to do - and at what was probably great personal and professional cost.

****

It struck her that he hadn’t contacted her to tell her what he had done, to beg for her to come back to him. She had had to seek him out to find out the truth. What did that mean?

****

“To be clear, and not to excuse myself - but I was not directly responsible for any of the illegal activity. But I knew of it, and did nothing to stop it from happening.”

****

“So, I’ve made a deal with the government, in exchange for my evidence I won’t be looking at jail time. I  _ will _ be losing pretty much everything I have, save for the clothes on my back and a few possessions and assets that I came into independently of First Order. But that seems a fair price to pay. Cheap, even.” He shrugged.

****

Rey knew how much Ben’s possessions and lifestyle meant to him, heck - she had enjoyed them herself for the time they were together. As Rey had listened to his words, her mind was a whirlwind of emotions and thoughts. His sacrifice, his actions, his decisions all spoke of something else. Of someone else other than who she had told herself that he was.

****

His face had been earnest but somewhat impassive as he had told Rey the truth of what had happened between him and First Order Security. Almost as if he was divorced from it, and had made his peace with it. It was very different from the Ben that was consumed with bitterness and resentment when he had talked about Luke and Skywalker Security all those weeks ago.

****

Suddenly, his expression changed, his voice cracking with emotion as he spoke.

****

“Rey, I’m sorry I dragged you into this. I’m sorry for the hurt that I caused you. I have had a lot of time to think about what I did, and what I lost - and deserved to lose. I know that the time we had together was difficult for you, and required you to compromise too much of who you are. That last night that we had together, my behaviour was reprehensible and cruel. I understand and respect why you don’t want anything to do with me. Every single thing you said to me was the truth.”

****

Rey felt herself soften at his words, relief beginning to rise within her at hearing his apology, and his acknowledgement of what a complete ass he had been. A complete and total ass who might deserve forgiveness, but not a second chance, she told herself.

****

The fact that he wasn’t asking for a second chance also hit her in the chest like a wrecking ball.

****

“I know that I was the worst thing that ever happened to you, a mistake. But know this - you were the best thing that ever happened to me. Even though we are not together, the way you changed me, showed me what it was to be decent, principled and good - I will carry that with me always.”

****

“You only ever stuck to our agreement. You didn’t betray me with Luke, I betrayed you. That’s the thing I lo….” He stopped himself mid sentence again. “That is what is best about you, Rey, you are all that is good and right.”

****

Not once during any of his admission did his eyes leave her face. She knew he was speaking the truth.

****

It confused the heck out of her.

****

Rey felt the anchor that was her assessment of Ben Solo’s character shift from its mooring, casting her adrift. Nothing of what he had said fit with the story she had been clinging to, a story that kept her safe and protected her.

****

So, she decided to do what risk-averse people do best - get the hell out of there.

****

“Well, now I see. Thank you for your candor. I accept your apology. Good luck with the case.” She cringed at what she was saying, and the tone with which she had said it, but she had no idea what else to do.

****

“Thank you - for hearing me out,” he replied. His eyes then shifted from her face to some unknown point behind her head.

****

The conversation was over.

****

“I better get back to work before I am missed,” she said, more to herself than to him.

****

“Bye, Rey,” he said to the spot behind her head.

****

Ben still stood to the right of the door, giving her a clear path to leave. She quickly crossed the foyer and gripped the door handle, with every intention of opening it, walking out of his apartment, and out of his life, forever.

****

Something on the hall table to the left of her caught her eye. It was a small package, addressed to Ben Solo, in her handwriting. 

****

Rey turned to face him, her hand still at the door to leave.

****

“You didn’t open it? It was your grandfather’s pen. I was returning it to you.” Now she was utterly confused, and she found herself rooted to the spot and unable to leave.

****

“I know,” he said. “I don’t need it. It serves no purpose other than to tie me to the past, and there are more important things than history, legacy and birthright.”

****

Her resolve to walk out the door had now completely crumbled. She rested her head against the door, the tears that she had been holding back welling in her eyes. She closed her eyes, seeking to shut everything out other than him and her, causing her tears to spill over onto her cheeks.

****

“Ben, you were not the worst thing that ever happened to me. I was so angry and hurt when I said that, and I’m sorry. It was a terrible, horrible thing to say, and it was a lie. A lie I told the both of us so I didn’t have to face up to the truth.”

****

She felt a shift in his demeanor, in the way he held himself. He stopped looking at the spot on the wall, and looked directly at her instead. 

****

She sucked in a deep breath and continued on.

****

“You changed me for the better, too. You saw right through my fear, and challenged my idea of who I was and what I’m capable of. You showed me what it is to be brave, to go for what you want, and to take risks. Because I’ve been playing it safe my entire life - until I took this job - and until I met you. No one else sees me in the way you do, and without you I would still be believing that I was a nobody, and nothing special. But I always felt special with you.”

****

“I said that you could tell me anything, that nothing would change my feelings for you, but I wasn’t prepared for the reality of it. I wanted to live in my safe little world where everyone plays by the rules and nobody makes a mistake. I wasn’t ready to accept you entirely, your past and your flaws. I only wanted the easy and the comfortable.”

****

Her voice wavered at her last sentence.

****

“Ben, I’ve been so miserable without you.”

****

She felt a tremendous weight lift from her, like the internal forces that warred within her had vanished, just leaving peace and purpose in their place.

****

Ben stood there, not saying anything. She could hear his shallow breathing, he was so close to her. But not close enough.

****

She dropped her handbag onto the floor, spilling its contents across the parquetry boards. 

Her head still resting against the door, Rey stretched out her arm, reaching for his shirt. As she felt the soft fabric under her fingers, she grabbed hold, using it to pull him towards her. He moved smoothly, his strong arms threaded around her finally, and he rested his chin on the top of her head, simply breathing her in. She turned to face him, burying her hands and face into his chest as all the emotion she had been holding onto since the day of their terrible argument came tumbling out in heaving sobs.

****

Ben continued to hold her as she wept, one arm around her waist, the other raised to stroke her hair, whispering to her that he was sorry, and that everything was going to be alright.

****

As always, the one responsible for her pain was also the only person who could help relieve her of it.

****

Eventually, all the grief and pain left her, and her sobs subsided to a hitch of her breath and the occasional whimper.

****

“Ben?” she said, raising her face from his chest to look up at him. From the look of it, she had not been the only one experiencing intense emotion.

****

“Yes, Rey?” Ben smiled down at her, and it had been so long since she had seen it, she had forgotten how happy it made her.

****

“I love you,” she said softly - this time her love was freely given, not tinged with sadness, regret or confusion - and not bound in a revelation of an unresolved past.

****

Her love for him pulsed within her like a heartbeat: steady, clear and true.

****

She felt him meld into her more, and whatever space that had existed between them physically and emotionally prior to this had immediately dissipated, along with her grief and sorrow at what had come to pass between them.

****

Ben’s face beamed down at her, relief, love, happiness and elation sweeping across his expression. She hadn’t recognised how tired he had looked now that the intensity and worry had been replaced with something new.

****

“ _ Mon rayon de soleil _ , I love you more than the stars, the moon and the entire galaxy. Rey, if you will have me, and if you will let me, I will love and cherish you for the rest of my days. There is no other for me but you, and I want to build something new between us. No more mistakes, risks, secrets, hiding or bargains. The only deal I want is the one where I can make you happy and we spend the rest of our lives together.”

****

“That’s a very enticing deal. All upside, no compromise - I think I want that, too.” She said. She very, very much wanted just to agree to all of it. But she wasn’t entirely ready just yet - there were many things they still had to work through, and she was done making agreements without understanding the fine print.

****

Ben seemed to accept her response. For a moment they simply gazed at each other, lost in the moment that they were embarking on new, uncharted territory.

****

Rey’s body was not going to betray her this time - she knew the warm glow that was rapidly turning into a raging wildfire inside of her was the most appropriate reaction - given what they had just shared and his proximity. She was always in awe of just how safe and alive she felt in his arms. 

****

The last time he had touched her in an intimate way had been interrupted so catastrophically. It was time for new memories.

****

“So, you gonna kiss me or what?” she said, a cheeky smile coming to her lips.

****

“Rey, I’m gonna do more than kiss you,” he replied with a low growl.

“Bedroom.” she said firmly.

****

“Bedroom.” he agreed with a nod.

****

To her surprise Ben suddenly scooped her up, and she immediately responded by wrapping her legs around his waist. One arm went easily around her waist to support her, like she weighed no more than a rag doll, the other threaded through the hair at the nape of her neck to bring her face towards his.

****

As he captured her mouth with his, it occurred to her that she was going to be leaving with her heart and dignity intact, along with the love of Ben Solo. Her panties were going to be an entirely different matter. 

****

She returned his kiss with equal passion, and she thought her heart might explode from happiness. He responded by groaning into her mouth, his tongue probing hers. He tasted so good, and she was consumed by the feeling of being in full contact with his broad, hard chest. She had always revelled in his hardness and size, she never feared it, and whenever he held her like this it always made her feel safe, protected - and lucky.

****

As his mouth continued to explore hers, and his grip around her waist tightened, she felt her core throb with a powerful need unlike anything she had ever experienced. There was something different from the times before this when they had been intimate. Yes - there was passion, excitement, intensity - all things she was familiar with. But this time, guilt and fear were replaced with relief and freedom. It was a heady cocktail that made her head swim, and all other thoughts disappear from her mind.

****

Ben didn’t break their kiss for a moment as he carried her to his bedroom.

****

As he entered the room, he made straight for the bed, only lowering her down once his shins made contact with the edge of the bed. Once he was confident she was safe, he covered her body with his frame, smothering her with a thousand kisses to her face as he ground his hardness against the inside of her thigh.

****

She moaned as she felt it, her panties flooding with arousal. She writhed on the bed as she was pinned underneath him, wanting him so desperately it hurt. Suddenly he collapsed onto her, his face burying into her shoulder.

****

“What’s wrong, Ben?” This was entirely unlike him, and she was eager to get whatever the problem was sorted so they could get down to the business of consummating their new arrangement.

“I don’t know where to start,” he moaned in her neck. “I want to do everything to you all at once. I can’t choose. I want to eat you out, I want to camp out at your g-spot, I want to be inside you and have you pulse and come around me, all of it.

****

She giggled, delighting in his quandary, and his passion for her.

****

“Let me make it easy for you - make love to me, Ben, take me, own me, possess me. There will be time enough for everything else later. I just need you inside me.”

****

He lifted his head and grinned down at her, his hair flopping down into his eyes. 

****

“Well, when you put it like that, you make the decision very easy,” he said with a laugh. “Right - there are too many clothes for this scenario right now,” he said firmly. “Off!”

****

They laughed as they quickly shed their clothes. Rey was a little faster than Ben, so she took the opportunity to kneel up and take his face in her hands to give him a long, slow, deep kiss that had him shaking by the time he had removed all his remaining apparel.

****

“Ben, I missed you every single day we were apart. You were never far from my thoughts, ever.” She drowned in his chocolate brown eyes that looked at her so softly, and with so much love, and she couldn’t remember a time in her life when she had felt happier or more complete.

****

He softly leaned down to start kissing her again, pushing her back against the bed, and her legs slid out from underneath her. His hardness rubbed up the inside of her leg - she felt the slickness on the head of his cock and groaned at just how firm he was.

****

“Ben, fuck, you are hard,” she breathed, her heart and core pounding at the idea of him thrusting inside her. She felt how tight and wet she was, and the only thing that could sate her was him being wrapped around her and as close with her as possible.

****

“Well, its mid afternoon, you're beautiful and I love you. Plus… it's been a few weeks.”

****

“Good to hear,” she quipped - but she was utterly relieved that he hadn’t been with anyone else since her.

****

“Shit Rey, how the hell could I? There’s no one for me except you - let me show you.” He positioned himself up a little higher, so the underside of his cock was rubbing up against her clit and folds. His eyes grew wide as he sensed how engorged, wet and ready she was for him.

****

“Fuck, Rey,” he stammered. “You are so fucking wet for me.” He picked up the pace of his rubbing, sending pulses of energy throughout her body. They both knew that she wouldn’t be far away from climaxing if he kept up what he was doing.

****

“Well, it’s mid afternoon, you’re about to fuck me and I love you, too.” She half moaned, half giggled until the pressure and pace of his grinding really began to take hold, and she began to lose the ability to speak.

****

She moved her legs up the length of his body some more, until they rested on his shoulders, meaning his pelvis could bear down on her harder. It felt good and right to have him like this, and to be in his bed.

****

There was just one thing missing.

****

Rey reached down between her legs to grab Ben’s cock, marvelling at how smooth and velvety he felt in her hand.

****

She gave him a couple long strokes for good measure, causing him to jerk against her palm. He looked at her in awe, like he wasn’t entirely sure what she was up to, but he was absolutely along for the ride.

****

He began to ask, “Honey, what are you..” when she suddenly lined him up to her entrance and pushed him all the way in. Because of the angle, he was immediately seated inside her, and while she easily enveloped him in her pulsing heat, she was still incredibly tight around him. She gasped in shock as his girth stretched her out wider than usual, it was an unusual sting that was not unpleasant, but absolutely gave the indication that something large, hot and heavy was inside her.

****

“Mother fuck!” he shouted in surprise, his cock jerking in excitement at the sudden change of scenery. He braced himself against the bed, holding himself rigid against her.

****

“Don’t move,” he groaned.

****

Rey giggled, which then turned into a moan, which also caused her abdomen to move in response.

****

“Don’t laugh! Rey, you are going to kill me. Fuck you’re tight,” he growled.

****

She loved the power she had over this man.

****

“Ben, I ah, can’t move anyway. I seem to have bitten off more than I can chew,” she said, still waiting for her body to adjust to him. Fuck, he was really, really hard - and really, really big this time.

****

“Greedy kitten,” he purred against her neck, the honey that dripped from his tongue and the vibration of his voice against her throat helped her to relax.

****

“Ready?” he whispered softly against her ear.

****

“Yes,” she breathed, finally feeling herself become adjusted to him. 

****

Her heart fluttered in her chest as he slowly began to move inside her. It was difficult at first - her core was so tightly gripped around him - almost like it was holding him inside her and didn't want to let him go. But as he leaned down to press his swollen mouth to hers, she felt that extra nudge of bliss overwhelm her, allowing her to completely relax into him. She was completely crushed beneath him, overpowered and utterly lost. She loved it.

****

He sensed that she was completely ready now, and his movements became more rapid and deeper. Her entire body was tingling with sensation as he began to hit that spot deep within her that only he could reach. 

****

It was the same Ben, the same body, the same connection - but now it was different. She sank into it, this other feeling of euphoria of being close to him again. Being loved and cherished by him. Intimacy strummed between them, as though she could touch it.

****

Fuck, she had missed him.

****

“This… this is something else,” he whispered in her ear. “Do you feel it too?”

****

“Yes, it’s different, it’s.... more,” she replied.

****

“I love it,” he said, his breath hitching as he spoke.

****

He lifted her higher, the new angle eliciting new sensations within her. A deep pressure began to well inside her, almost overwhelming in its intensity - but she was ready. 

****

She reached up to hold his head in her hands, smoothing away the strands of hair that spilled across his forehead. Their eyes met, and she knew that as long as she lived, she would never know a man as wonderful, infuriating, impetuous and passionate as Ben.

****

“I love you,” she said.

****

“I fucking love you,” he growled.

****

Her heart sang, and a new wave of happiness heightened the physical sensations of his thrusts. She wrapped her arms around him, and uncoupled her legs from his shoulders to wrap them around his waist again. While it changed the angle at which he entered her, it meant her legs were no longer a barrier between them, and she was able to pull him close to her chest to hold him close.

****

He seemed to feel the increased closeness as well, as his body started to stutter and his rhythm became more erratic as he got closer to completion. 

****

“Rey, honey, I.,.” He moaned into her shoulder.

****

The rising pressure finally exploded within her, and she screamed as she clenched around him, wave after wave of pleasure rocking her. The freedom, relief and closeness, intermingled with raw, unbridled ecstasy - and she understood why the word orgasm meant little death.

****

He was not far behind, and he completely lost control as he came inside her, roaring into her neck, pulsing within her. He lay there, still sheathed inside her for several minutes as they rode through their aftershocks together. Finally, he rolled off her with a loud groan and she quickly snuggled into the crook of his arm.

****

They dozed lazily afterwards in each others arms, both completely spent and contented.

****

“What’s the time?” she murmured.

****

“Mmmm,” he roused sleepily. “About half two?”

****

Reality quickly set in.

****

“Shit! Work will be wondering where the hell I am!” she exclaimed. She had definitely been away longer than a “just remembered something.”

****

“Where is my phone?” She quickly scrambled out of the bed in panic.

****

“Use mine,” he reached over onto the nightstand to grab his phone. She marvelled at the span of his arms and chest as he stretched.

****

“Very bloody funny, Solo, no way am I using your phone to call my office.”

****

“My darling, I simply thought you might want to use my phone to call yours,” he said easily as he entered his PIN code to unlock it. 

****

“Well, yes, that makes much more sense,” she admitted, swiping the phone from his hand. She opened up his contact list, and scrolled down to R.

****

But Rey wasn’t listed. 

****

“What the fuck, Solo, I’m not even here!” She said indignantly, conveniently forgetting that she had also deleted his contact details.

****

“ _ Mon rayon de soleil,  _ try down a little further under S,” he said with a smirk.

****

“ _ What, S for Spy _ ?” She said sarcastically. 

****

“No, my acerbic kitten, take a look.” He replied - the smirk still across his stupidly handsome face.

****

“Oh,” she said quietly as she looked. “S is for Sunshine.”

****

Ben chuckled. “Correct,” he confirmed.

****

She had the decency to look chagrined. He wasn’t listed in her phone at all.

****

“Where would I find my name listed?” He asked. 

****

“Well, you wouldn’t - because I deleted it,” she admitted. “But before that, you would have been found under P. For  _ Peeping Tom _ .”

****

In actual fact, it had been under R - for Risky Business.

****

He dove for her, playfully wrestling her onto the bed. She squealed in delight as they became a tangle of limbs and hands. 

****

“I suppose I deserve both of those,” he growled. “But I’m still going to take it out of your hide later for your insolence.”

****

She rather thought she would enjoy that.

****

She finally remembered where she had left her phone - in her bag by the door. She wriggled out from under him, keenly aware that he was becoming hard again. She didn’t want to waste any more time.

****

“I’ll be back,” she said as she went to get her phone. Her backward glance revealed Ben lounging on his side on the bed, clearly taken with her form.

****

She added a little wiggle for his benefit.

****

She collected her things off the floor, grimacing when she saw the missed calls and messages from Finn on her phone.

****

She quickly sent Finn a text.

****

_ Sorry Finn, something important came up and I won't be available for the rest of the day. Please let Holdo know. _

****

She padded back to the bedroom, where Ben was waiting for her. He was still entirely naked,  with his head resting on top of his forearm. She felt that familiar tug deep in her belly at the sight of him.

****

“Work has sent a search party out looking for me,” she said ruefully. “But I sent a message to a friend telling him I wouldn’t be back today.”

****

“Does that mean you will stay?” he asked, his eagerness entirely evident. “Your toothbrush is still charged and ready to go, and you look really cute in my t-shirts and hoodies.”

****

“I’m not going anywhere, Ben Solo,” she replied. “Plus, I believe I’m owed some kind of punishment for insolence…”

****

With a wolfish grin Ben jumped up, scooping her up and throwing her on the bed, earning him a delighted shriek from Rey.

****

As he settled down, with his face hovering about the apex of her thighs, she was sure this was going to be a very through punishment, and she would absolutely learn her lesson. Over and over again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Phew, things are looking good for our lovebirds now.
> 
> Of course, there are a couple of things left unresolved - what will happen to Rey and her job - and what will the fallout be when Luke and Amy find out she is in a relationship with Ben Solo.
> 
> Stay turned for the final instalment.


	9. Future's so bright, I gotta wear shades

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tying it all up, in one sweet, filthy package. Rey finally comes clean about Ben, and everyone has a chance to heal from the past.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the final chapter! I have a bunch of thank yous which I have posted at the end of the fic.

Rey dozed in Ben’s arms. Over the last few weeks he had displayed an even keener interest in setting up camp at her g spot, and she was quietly confident that they were breaking national park fire ordinances from the heat he was able to generate within her.

****

She knew she should have started her day forty minutes ago, but as per usual, Ben had made a very convincing argument for her to stay in bed a little longer.

****

“You have to get up now, darling,” he said as he nuzzled her cheek.

****

“You are a bad, bad man, Ben. Contributing to the delinquency of a person such as myself.” She stretched out like a cat, lazy and indulgent, and looked up at Ben as she saw that twinkle in his eye she knew all too well as he appraised her form.

****

“Quit it, Solo,” she growled, quickly jumping out of bed before he could convince her to stay a little longer. It was far too tempting.

****

The water was warm on her skin under the shower. She closed her eyes in bliss as it washed away the evidence of the morning’s activities, and winced a little as the water hit between her thighs. She didn’t mind, in fact she liked the reminder of where he had been. Her relationship with Ben was beyond anything she had dreamed for herself, and even now she couldn’t quite believe that things had fallen into place so wonderfully.

****

His warm body slid in behind her, and she turned to look at him. 

****

“Good luck today. I love you, and no matter what you are amazing.” He gently kissed her forehead as she leaned into him, and he wrapped his arms around her. She could feel the electricity between them as always, but it was enveloped in security, comfort and shared understanding.

****

“Yeah, I think I’ll need it.”

****

“You will be fine, _mon_ _rayon de soleil,_ you will be just fine. But I’m here, should you need me.”

****

__________

****

“Luke, can I speak with you for a moment?”

****

Rey had spent the last ten minutes psyching herself up in the ladies bathroom to have this conversation. It was time. Light Side Security had won the contract, Luke and Holdo were beyond thrilled and the entire office was abuzz with preparations.

****

Rey was happy for them, and for herself, of course. It was an amazing achievement - but her heart wasn’t in it anymore. She wasn’t sure what she wanted to do, but she knew it wasn’t with the new company - and they needed to know. 

****

With the court case about to start, she also had the strong suspicion that her relationship with Ben was going to become public knowledge anyway. The prosecution had warned them the First Order would most likely try to discredit Ben on the witness stand, but they were confident the evidence that Ben had provided was strong enough to withstand it.

****

She wasn’t entirely sure with how things would play out, but she knew going to Luke rather than Amy was the safer bet by a galactic mile.

****

“Sure Rey, take a seat.” Luke smiled at her, and she hoped he would still be smiling by the end of the conversation. But she doubted it.

****

Rey took in a deep breath.

****

“It’s time for me to go. You have been a wonderful teacher and mentor, and I will carry your lessons with me always, but I need to move on,” Rey watched his face intently, trying to read his thoughts - but as per usual, he was quite inscrutable.

****

“I see…” he said slowly. “Does Amy know?”

****

“Not yet, I thought I would come to you first. Maybe then we could break the news together?”

****

“Let me handle Amy,” he said with a wry smile. He paused for a moment to ask, “How long till you leave?” 

****

“That depends on your thoughts on the other… thing… I need to tell you.”

He cocked an eyebrow, clearly curious as to what was coming next.

****

“I am in love… with Ben. Your nephew... Ben.”

****

Both eyebrows raised in surprise - she imagined that her declaration of love for Ben Solo was perhaps the last thing he expected to hear.

****

“I know who my nephew is, Rey. So you… love him. I assume he knows who… you… are?” He drawled.

****

Rey laughed drily. “Yes, he does. He loves me, too.”

****

“I see. How long has this.... love gone on for?”

****

“Since before I met you. Perhaps four weeks after I started working here. Then we had a break, now we have been back together for about a month.”

****

Luke wasn’t giving anything away as he paused to reflect on what she was saying.

****

“Did this…. love have anything to do with what happened with Ben at First Order - and the court case?” He asked.

****

By now the security world was abuzz with the upcoming court proceedings for First Order Security on embezzlement and fraud. Armitage Hux’s scowling mug had graced many a newspaper front cover for the last fortnight - once it all became public.

****

“Somewhat,” Rey admitted carefully. “It was Ben’s decision, while we were broken up, to do it. He wanted to make things right.” Rey was keen for Luke to know the sacrifice Ben had made, not that it atoned for what Ben had done to Luke - but that it showed that Ben had changed. That Ben was not the headstrong, impulsive, destructive person that had destroyed Skywalker Security anymore.

****

“I see. Good thing for you we won the contract,” he said wryly.

****

“Yes, I know,” Rey agreed, the thought had occurred to her many,  _ many _ times since the announcement was made. In fact, really, it was her only saving grace from retribution from anyone, including Amy. It was hard to argue that she had done any real damage to the business, despite breaking the rule about no engagement with the enemy, when they were the victors.

****

Luke shifted his head to one side, clearly trying to process what she had just shared.

****

“Can you give me a moment, Rey? To consider what you have told me.”

****

Rey nodded mutely and quickly left Luke’s office. 

****

She waited nervously at her desk, not sure if she should pack her things or evacuate immediately. Or, perhaps if she should expect building security to arrive ready to escort her out in handcuffs - which would be slightly ironic really given the nature of the business. 

****

At the same time, she felt the immense relief of no longer having to hide her relationship with Ben any longer. They could do regular couple things, like browse real estate listings (that they couldn’t afford), and shop for antique furniture (that they couldn’t afford, and also had nowhere to put even if they could), and -  _ gasp _ \- go out to dinner, the movies, the dry cleaners, the dentist, or even the darn _ supermarket _ without fear of being discovered or seen. It was a new dawn for their relationship, and it excited the hell out of her.

****

She heard Luke clearing his throat in the doorway. She looked up, bracing herself for the worst, praying that he wouldn’t be angry with her or never want to speak to her again. She really valued his support and friendship.

****

“Well, Rey, I’m sad, but not surprised, to see you go. I think we both agree it's for the best that you pack up your things immediately. I will handle things with Amy. She will get over it eventually, but you are going to have to give her time and space. At least a year, maybe more,” he said wryly. 

****

Rey nodded, she understood the need for her to go. Business was business, and it was entirely untenable that she remained at the company to serve out her notice period. Amy would never have trust or confidence in her again once she found out about Rey’s relationship with Ben. It was impossible. 

****

She hoped one day Amy would be able to stand the sight of her again - but it was not the most important thing by a long shot. It was strange how it had all turned out, the thing she had come here for, which was Amy’s mentorship, was the thing that held the least value for her in the end.

****

Luke continued.

****

“But before you go, can I ask you a few questions? To help me understand, and to help me explain things.” 

****

“Sure, ask away”. Now that the truth was finally out, she had nothing to hide.

****

“Did you ever share any of our corporate secrets, or the about the merger? Did you break your confidentiality agreement?” 

****

As always, Luke was blunt and to the point.

****

Rey winced a little at his questions, but understood the questions needed to be asked. She shook her head emphatically. “No, not once. In fact, that was the reason we broke up - because he was angry with me for  _ not _ telling him.” She realised that her statement didn’t really show Ben in the best light. “But he understands now,” she added quickly.

****

It was about as far as she was willing to go into the specifics of that night, and she was relieved when he appeared to drop that line of inquiry.

****

“How did you two lovebirds meet? Was it at a conference or a meeting?”

****

Rey took a deep breath in and walked to the window. She drew the blind up, and pointed outside.

****

“See that office over there, the one with the blue ink on the window?”

****

Luke narrowed his eyes and nodded.

****

“That is Ben’s old office. That’s First Order headquarters.”

****

Luke choked at her response.

****

“What?” He looked as if he was about to have a heart attack, or an aneurysm, or something similar. She wasn’t that confident with her CPR, but she did know how to dial 911.

****

“Yup. Been there the whole time.” 

****

The irony that neither he nor Amy knew that the enemy camp was under their nose had never been lost on her. The same went for First Order Security, despite all the money and power at their disposal. Sure, the website details for both companies had only pointed to a postal box, but still…...

****

She hoped the Lightside Security intel for their contract would be a little more thorough. For the sake of the nation.

****

Luke whistled softly and jerkily raked his fingers through his hair.

****

“Jesus. Let’s keep that one between us for now.”

****

“With pleasure,” she responded, she had no intention of stirring up any more trouble than she already had. Now that the First Order Office was all but gone - funny how fraud and embezzlement charges made existing clients disappear like ships into the night - it hardly seemed important anymore. 

****

“Rey, can I ask one more question? As a friend - and as an uncle?” Luke looked at her seriously, and she knew the next question was an important one.

****

“Sure,” Rey said curiously.

****

“Do you think Ben might agree to meet with me? In a neutral location?”

****

Rey was surprised, but pleased that he had asked for her help - she hoped that if Luke and Ben were able to mend bridges, perhaps Ben could reunite with the rest of his family. Ben might be loathe to admit it, even to her, but he missed them greatly.

****

“I don’t know Luke, but I can ask,” she replied.

_________

****

“This is stupid, I’m not doing this.”

****

Rey could tell that Ben was working his way to one of his infamous moods. It was like the man had been taken back to being a young boy at the prospect of seeing his uncle again.

****

When Rey had approached Ben about the meeting, she’d been struck by just how far down his longing to reconcile with his family ran. 

****

His demeanour had immediately turned from cocky and smug to unsure and small (if that was even possible), and she felt for the young man, who underneath it all, had been desperate for approval and affirmation.

****

Not that that excused his nuclear scale methods of dealing with things when he didn’t get said approval and affirmation, she reminded herself.

****

So, now they were standing out front of the diner Rey had chosen as neutral ground for the meeting. His disposition had darkened considerably since they had left Ben’s apartment. 

****

“Just give things a chance, Ben. Give Luke a chance,” Rey said softly. She was tempted to add - give  _ yourself _ a chance.

****

“I need to let the past die, Rey. I need to put it all behind me,” he said, stony faced, his arms folded across his chest.

****

Ben might be a stubborn son of a biscuit, but Rey was not without her own determination and wiles.

****

“Solo, I understand you are nervous, I understand this is hard. But I know Luke. He just wants to talk. I think the person who withstood the cross examination of the First Order defence team and sent Hux down for fifteen years -  _ and _ sacrificed his career for the greater good - can have a coffee with an old man. Don't you?”

****

He appeared unmoved by her plea. It was time to bring out the big guns.

****

She rose up on her tiptoes and threaded her arms around his neck. His arms remained crossed, but she felt him relax into her a little, and a small smile twitched at the corner of his mouth.

****

She gave him a soft kiss, breaking away only to make a soft suggestion she knew would end their stalemate.

****

“Take the risk, Ben. I’ll catch you.”

****

She felt the tension leave his body completely. 

****

“Fine,” he mumbled. “But I get control of the TV remote tonight,” he added, in a final burst of petulance. He hated to lose, plus he was a Netflix hog.

****

Luke, ever punctual, was already waiting for them. Both men looked uncomfortable, and she was relieved that they had agreed that she should attend as well.

****

Stubbornness and bad temperedness were a Skywalker Family trait, but Rey was smart, and she knew both of them well enough to guide them through a difficult conversation.

****

The three of them sat in a painful silence, and Rey sighed as she realised that she would have to be the one to break the ice.

****

“Luke, Ben has something to say to you.” She lightly prodded Ben’s side with her elbow as a prompt.

****

Ben shifted awkwardly in his chair and cleared his throat.

****

“Sorry, I ah...destroyed the family company,” he muttered, staring at the floor.

****

She poked him gently again.

****

“I’m sorry I ruined your reputation.” This time his eyes rose to fix on Luke, and Rey could tell that Ben was becoming more comfortable and at peace with the amends he was making.

****

To her joy, Ben continued.

****

“I’m sorry we couldn’t find a way to work together. To continue Skywalker Security and to continue the family legacy. That was what I really wanted - to work by your side.”

****

“I know I can’t atone for what I did, for the pain and suffering I caused you - and my parents. In trying to keep the family legacy alive, I destroyed it instead.”

****

As Ben fell silent again, his eyes went back to the floor.

****

Rey squeezed his hand gently, no matter the outcome from this meeting, he had done the right thing - the hard thing - and set aside his pride and his (surprisingly fragile) ego to face his past misdeeds.

****

Ben was right - he couldn’t make up for what he did. But it was possible for Luke to forgive.

****

It was Luke’s turn to speak. He wasn’t awkward like Ben, he was clear and confident. That was the benefit of age, wisdom and lived regret, Rey supposed.

****

“Ben, I failed you. Your ideas for the company -   _ largely _ \- were just what was needed to take it into a new era and to evolve it. You had a vision and a drive that scared me - I blocked you at every turn. And while perhaps your methods were somewhat…. extreme, I understand. Believe it or not, I was young once too.” 

****

“I forgive you, Ben. What is done is done. Plus, eventually, you took out the competition for me. Thanks for destroying the First Order from the inside, much appreciated. Can’t thank you enough, really.”

****

Rey rolled her eyes inwardly, there was that Skywalker snark again.

****

Ben smiled slyly.

****

“Actually, it’s Rey you really need to thank. If it wasn’t for her, First Order would wiping the floor with Lightside Security. All the way to the bank.”

****

_ Well, what do you know, there’s what I assume is the Solo cocksureness.  _

****

“Ben, we still would have kicked your ass,” she rebuked. ‘You would have been left crying into an empty bank account.”

****

“Touche,” Ben grinned.

****

Rey had a feeling he would - good naturedly - challenge on her this long into the future. She was good for it. She wasn’t going to let him take all the credit for Lightside’s success.

****

She wondered for the millionth time what his parents were like, and if she would ever get to meet them.

****

Rey sensed the tension had finally broken, and while the future of Ben and Luke’s relationship was unclear, at least they had mended the rift between them.

****

Luke chuckled. “Looks like you have met your match there, Ben.”

****

Ben squeezed Rey’s hand. “Yes sir, I do believe I have.”

****

“There’s only one thing I ask of you, Ben.” Luke reverted back to his previous seriousness.

****

Rey had was pretty sure she knew what was coming next.

****

“Call your mother, Ben. She misses you.”

****

  ___________

****

As Rey strode into her new office building, she was struck by how nondescript it was, just a regular office building, with a regular plaza - and no ornamental ponds or trip hazards.

****

Hopefully it held no corporate enemies, although she was not sure if it was possible for her new employer to  _ have _ corporate enemies. He charmed the pants off everyone.

****

She climbed the staircase to the second floor, smiling as she read the sign on the door - Dameron Services. Her new permanent home. 

****

Rey looked at her reflection in the glass door and grinned again. She knew she looked good - and in addition, there was an inner glow and confidence about herself that hadn’t been there before. 

****

She couldn’t wait until she could get stuck into her new consulting role, supporting businesses to expand and grow. She and Poe had hit it off immediately, he had an easy charm about him that worked well with her own professional sensibilities. Luke had made the introduction, but the rest had been up to the two of them. 

****

It was a tiny set up to say the least - just her and Poe, but they had big plans to help small startups and entrepreneurs get off the ground. Rey was really excited at the idea of helping many small businesses rather than one big corporation. It was a risk to be sure - but like Ben said sometimes you had to ante up. She was ready for it - to set her own path and define her own future.

****

Poe smiled up from his desk as she walked through the door.

****

“Hey, first day Rey!” He said warmly.

****

“Morning Poe,” she beamed back. “It’s good to be here.”

****

She walked to the only other desk in the office and plonked down her bag. 

****

“So, we have a very formal process with induction here,” he said sagely. “First, let me give you the office tour. Now, slowly turn around.”

****

She laughed as she did what he requested.

****

He clapped his hands together. “Excellent, office tour is done! Next, the rules around here are - there aren’t any. I trust you Rey - Luke speaks very highly of you. Let’s work things out as we go along.”

****

Their attention turned to the sound of the front door opening, and they were greeted by a very disgruntled delivery man, who had had to lug up what looked like a very large, very cumbersome pot plant up the stairs. It was at least half as tall as she was, with large flat leaves and a glossy green base. She loved it immediately. 

****

“I have a package for Rey Niima,” he grunted, clearly put out.

****

Rey smiled, she knew it was a first day at the new job gift from Ben, to replace the old one that had been left to wither and die after she needed to relocate to work with Luke. She remembered with a smile the first time she met Ben, as he peered through the fronds of her pot plant, carried it for her, bought her a coffee and then confessed to “not” being a pervert.

****

“Let me sign for it,” she said, making a mental note to give an extra tip on top of the already generous one Ben was sure to have given.

****

Poe looked slightly bemused at the plant - but chose to remain silent.

****

Rey looked around for an appropriate place to keep it. She spotted the window behind her desk, and with slight trepidation walked up and pulled the blind. She erupted into peals of laughter as her view was of the multi story car park next door.

****

Poe just shook his head with a chuckle. Rey thought he might be a good match for Bazine, she liked the dashing, charismatic type - and Poe had that in spades. She was catching up with Bazine and Finn later in the week - she was relieved that both of them had wanted to remain her friend, despite the secret she had been keeping from them.

****

In fact, she was pretty sure Bazine heartily approved of her relationship.

****

Poe helped her drag the pot to sit under the window, and Rey quickly took a picture on her phone to send to Ben.

****

She sat down at her desk, running her hands along the worn leather insert. She was content, and she was looking forward to what lay ahead.

****

_ My desk, my office, my new career, my pot plant. _

****

_ Thank god for a boring window. _

_________

****

Ben was on the floor of his lounge room, elbow deep in moving boxes, when she returned to his apartment later that evening. 

****

As his apartment had been seized by the government as a part of the First Order legal proceedings - he needed somewhere else to live. For the present time he and Rey had planned that he would move into her place while they considered their options.

****

Ever the little prince, he had continued to grumble at the very  _ idea _ that he had to do his own packing.

****

But, she had reminded him that she knew his daily schedule, and that without a job, he wasn’t that busy. Or that flush with cash.

****

Her impudence had earned her several lashes - from his tongue, between her legs. It was a fair and just punishment.

****

As she bent over to kiss his forehead, he looked up from his packing to smile warmly at her.

****

“How was your first day?” He asked.

****

Exhausted, she flopped into the leather recliner Ben had refused to surrender to the authorities. 

****

“It was great! I think Poe and I are going to do great things together.”

****

She laughed softly as she saw his eyes narrow with what was more than a hint of jealousy.

****

“No need to be concerned darling - plus we have a gigantic tree that takes up at least half the office to watch over us. I assume that you bugged it, or installed a surveillance camera or something like that?” 

****

She knew what was coming once that familiar sly smile crept across his face.

****

“Takes one to know one,” he said slowly. He started a slow crawl toward her, and she let her legs slightly part to indicate she welcomed his advance.

****

“Indeed,” she replied. She didn’t know if the thrill of being seduced by Ben Solo would ever leave her. 

****

Probably not - and he didn’t really have to try that hard.

****

“Spy,” he growled, as he reached the foot of the chair. He reached around to press the release button to fully extend the recliner.

****

“Pervert,” she responded, her mouth curved in a cheeky smile. She wiggled down into the seat a little further. “The things you will do to get out of packing, Solo,” she chuckled.

****

Rey suddenly remembered something else Ben had been attempting to put off.

****

“Did you call your mother?” She asked softly.

****

He buried his face in her lap, and she threaded her hands through his hair to comfort him.

****

“ _ Mon rayon de soleil,  _ you sure know how to make a boner disappear,” he groaned.

****

“Oh, your boner is never really gone, Ben,” she said lightly, then her tone turned softer. “Did you call her?”

****

“Yes,” he replied gruffly, his voice muffled by her thighs.

****

“And….?”

****

He finally looked up at her, and hope and trepidation was written across his face.

****

“I’m invited to lunch this weekend. If it’s alright with you, I’ll go alone.”

****

Her heart sang with happiness for him. It was the final piece of the puzzle for resolving his past. Ben didn’t talk about his mother that often, but when he did, he seemed consumed with longing and regret. 

****

She gently stroked his cheek and smiled at him. “Ben, whatever you need.”

****

His hands started to snake up her thighs and underneath her dress. 

****

She giggled. “Ben, you will never finish packing your stuff into storage at this rate.”

****

“I’ll hire someone,” he said as his fingers hooked into the waistband of her panties.

****

“You don’t have any money,” she reminded him as she lifted herself up so he could remove them more easily.

****

“Sleep is for the weak and the foolish,” he replied as he tossed her panties over his shoulder.

“Plus, I really, really want to fuck you with what I’ve already got packed in my pants,” he growled.

****

Dear God, she loved his filthy mouth.

****

“I want to look at you first - all of you,” she purred. He liked to tell himself that he called the shots, but they both knew who  _ really _ held the upper hand. Plus, she was never one to miss an opportunity to admire his form.

****

She watched as he undressed, her hand lazily caressing her inner thigh. It always drove him crazy to have her so near, and yet so far. She revelled in the spark between them, the push and the pull towards the other. Sometimes yielding, sometimes taking - but always enjoying each other. She couldn’t quite wrap her head around the fact that he was hers, utterly devoted to her and to their future. 

****

They belonged together. 

****

He stood naked before her, and she in no way needed to mask how attractive she found him.

****

She appraised him as her eyes slowly trailed down his body. Her core clenched when she drank in his hardness, her desire taking over her need to tease. “Ben, you are magnificent. A national treasure. A god,” Rey rucked up her dress so she was fully exposed. “Now fuck me like you promised.” 

****

He grinned and dove at her legs, almost causing the recliner to topple. He braced them both to prevent it from happening, and then set to sucking the sensitive skin of her upper thigh. His eyes never left hers for a moment. He loved to watch her unravel.

****

“I missed you,” he muttered into her thigh.

****

“I missed you, too,” she sighed.

****

His nose began to ghost over her and she gave a little moan. He knew that was her signal that she was ready for him. 

****

“This is a stupid chair for this activity,” he grumbled as it tipped again. 

****

As he stood, to her delight, he deftly flung her over his shoulder. Ben always liked to show off his physicality. Rey never minded.

****

She gripped onto his back with a laugh. “Ben Solo, you give up too easily. I thought you liked a challenge?”

****

“I’m just reassessing my options,” he said, kissing her exposed butt cheek.

****

He seemed to come up with a solution, and he let her body slide down his. She groaned as his hardness came into contact with her warm, wet heat. 

****

He encircled her in his arms and kissed her softly, in the way that made her weak at the knees. As their tongues danced and probed under plush lips, she gave a little moan.

****

Her hands caressed and explored his chest and arms. He was hard underneath her palm, and she shivered as her nails lightly scratched in their wake.

****

His hands moved down to her ass, kneading her taut flesh as he pressed into her.

****

“I need you impaled on my cock, now,” he said as he broke their kiss.

****

He let go to walk around her, sinking down into the chair, his legs straight out in front of him - and she saw the plan immediately. She began to back herself up, straddling him as she went. As her back reached his chest, he pulled her down into his lap. She pulled her dress up over her head and quickly unclasped her bra.

****

His arm wound around her waist to hold her in place, and he began to rub his cock against her slick folds. She groaned in anticipation of what was to come. He rocked his pelvis harder, he felt so good against her, and she felt the warm pressure inside her build. She wanted him, she always wanted him - and she knew he felt the same.

****

“Fuck you feel good, Rey. I will never get used to this,” he whispered in her ear.

****

She ached to have him inside her.

****

He reached around with his other hand, to position himself against her entrance, then released his hand to let her slide down onto him. She whimpered as she sank onto him, enjoying the familiar sting as she adjusted to his size.

****

With him fully seated inside her, she rested her head against his shoulder, so she could breathe him in and nuzzle his face. It felt comforting and intimate, and she purred with pleasure.

****

He felt big and strong against her, and she watched his thighs clench as he began to thrust up into her. 

****

“You take me so well,” he grunted.

****

She began to grind against him, in the way she knew drove him wild. Her hands gripped the arm rest for leverage, and from his shudders and moans she knew she had hit her target.

****

“What you do to me, Rey. Fuck, baby, that’s so  _ good _ .”

****

The pressure was building faster now, like it always did. They knew each other’s bodies and were able to sense what the other needed intuitively, almost as if an invisible bond connected them. 

****

She clenched down around him, increasing the sensation as his drive up into her increased in intensity and speed.

****

“Yes…….” she moaned. “Like that, that’s perfect. What you do to  _ me _ , Solo.”

****

“I belong to you,” he grunted into her ear. “I am yours, my fucking mouth, and my fucking dick, and my fucking soul are all yours. For as long as you want me.”

****

She felt the same for him, giving herself freely to be possessed, owned, consumed and taken.

****

She could only breathe “same”, as his grip around her waist got tighter. As he kept her in position to take his thrusts, his hands squeezed and pinched at her nipples, each press perfectly timed to meet the pleasure his cock was giving her.

****

“I’m going to make you come, Rey.”

****

All she could do was moan in return, as he threaded his hand between her thighs to rub her swollen clit. The sensations rocked through her, as her breath hitched and her legs began to shake. She was melting into a puddle around him, and the delicious tension within her began to unravel.

****

She keened as her climax began to take hold, it rose within her as he hit the sweet spot inside her over and over again. She screamed as she came, it pulsed through her, and Ben knew exactly what to do to prolong her pleasure under the attention of his cock and hands. She felt his warmth spill into her as he grunted against her ear, his spasms rocking against her, a delicious wonderful feedback loop between the two of them.

****

She slumped against him, completely sated and content. He still remained inside her, the small aftershocks of his own orgasm generating sweet sensations inside her.

****

She nuzzled his face and said softly, “I love you, Ben.”

****

He leaned his face against hers and returned the sentiment with equal feeling. “I love you too, Rey.”

****

_________

****

As they lay, snuggled up together, Ben thought about the old life that he had, and the new one just beginning. He remembered his rules, and cringed at just how self centred and self focused he had been. Without Rey crashing into his life and turning everything up on its head, he would never have realised how empty and alone he felt. He would not have understood what a life lived well really meant.

****

Ben may have been a successful business man who always remained calm under pressure, but he knew it was not how true success could be measured.

****

He was also doing his best not to be a stage five clinger, as besotted as he was with her, he understood she had her own path to follow - just as he needed to work out what life beyond First Order Security meant for him. He didn’t know what exactly it was, but as long as he had Rey, he could be sweeping pavements for all he cared. 

****

Well, hopefully not. Maybe National Strategy Manager for Pavement Acquisition or some such thing.

****

In light of these realisations, Ben Solo thought it prudent to establish new rules for his new life with Rey.

****

_ Mon rayon de soleil……. _

  1. Please let me make love to you as often as possible. 
  2. Please talk to me about anything.
  3. Please share your problems with me.
  4. Please stay with me forever.
  5. Thank you for letting me keep my toothbrush at your place. 



**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Phew, so this marks the end of my first “big” in relative terms fic. 
> 
> Love of Escapism, you are a true champion of this fandom. The way you support, enable and encourage writers to come together and celebrate each other’s work is a gift to us all. You continually give back and I am in awe of your hard work and dedication, and try to follow your lead as an example of how a writer, collaborator and reader should be. Your live reads are so much fun and I appreciated every single one of them so much I can’t tell you, and then your lovely comments after (and on my other works too).
> 
> Andabate, thank you for the support with your knowledge and reference material to help me work out how the hell to structure this thing. Romance writing is a particular beast and it was so useful to have as an anchor and to remember which part of the cycle I was actually in. Otherwise it most likely would have been a hot mess (or even worse LUKEWARM). You are also an amazing writer of the sexy, sexy, fun and funny smut.
> 
> Thank you to all the readers who left comments and kudos, I know for some it’s just about the writing and don’t pay close attention to the hits, kudos and comments (imagine the freedom!), but I need to know my stuff is being read and enjoyed. If it wasn’t I wouldn’t see the point of doing it. So your encouragement and kind words meant so much.
> 
> My betas Taz and MyJediLife thank you for helping me with my work and my terrible punctuation. And for the “yes it’s fine” each time before I hit the post button. Your friendship and support mean the world. You both do SO MUCH for the fandom too, the support, time, betaing, team challenges (shhhh), encouragement and all of it. How you manage to put down your own (amazing) fics to support the work of others is a testament to what wonderful people you both are. I love being a Swolo sister so much and it would not be anywhere near as much fun without you both.
> 
> P.S. Readers, there is a suggestion of some kind of off shoot pen porn one shot but let’s see how we go.

**Author's Note:**

> If you are curious about the pen, the link is here https://chatterleyluxuries.com/product/visconti-limited-edition-jung-alchemy-fountain-pen.
> 
> It's fancy and oh-so-reylo.
> 
> If you enjoyed this fic, please leave kudos - or better yet - a comment. I love receiving and responding to comments, they make my day!


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